


I Love You More Than Words Can Say

by HazzaBearsSlut



Category: One Direction
Genre: Blow Jobs, Caught, Fingering, First Time, Fluff, Grinding, Hurt and comfort, Innocent Louis, M/M, Marriage, Mental Disorders, Mentions of Rape, Riding, Rimming, Smut, Subspace, Top!Harry, Toys, asshole!harry, bottom!Louis, religous louis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-10
Updated: 2016-10-10
Packaged: 2018-08-20 12:50:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 25,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8249716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HazzaBearsSlut/pseuds/HazzaBearsSlut
Summary: The one where Louis and Harry change each other in so many ways.





	

Louis was in his junior year in high school. Instead of getting drunk and partying and experimenting with drugs with his friends, or having flings all the time, he was at church, bible study, confession, he attended mass on Wednesday, Thursday, Saturday, and Sunday, it was what he loved. Jesus and God were what mattered to him, he devoted his life to God, he read the bible every single morning and every night and sometimes in between, he kneeled on his knees, prayed to his Lord and said his hail Mary's, holding the small crucifix around his neck. He prayed before lunch and other people noticed, but didn't say anything, because he was one of the deacon's sons, he was going to study to be a priest, everyone knew it. Louis had never even so much as orgasmed, he knew that he was never to spill his seed, he would never orgasm, for he would never marry so that he could be a priest. 

He knew homosexuality was wrong, but he knew that if he were to be interested in any type of love life, he would be gay, so every time he thought about it, he'd make sure to mention it on Tuesday or Thursday night confession. Every time, he was told to walk on his knees around the church for thirty minutes, sometimes forty five, say ten hail Mary's, and ask for forgiveness. He did, sometimes he would say eleven hail Mary's, he would light a candle in the sanctuary and say a prayer. Nobody picked on him when he posted pictures of him in his deacon's robes, he was the youngest in the church staff. He helped with baptisms and communion and he was proud of his life, devoted to his God. 

\--

"No, Liam." "Why, not, Lou? It's Saturday, I won't make you drink or try anything, it will be fun." "I have mass in the morning, I go to bed early, Liam." "Mass doesn't start until eleven, and we'll be home before midnight. Please? Just this once. I'll never ask you to come again if you don't like it." Liam begged. "No. My answer is final, Liam, I will not cave into your peer pressure." Louis said, sternly. Louis could practically hear Liam rolling his eyes. "Fine." Liam snapped. "I'll talk to you tomorrow after mass, okay, Liam?" Louis asked. "Wait!" Liam said, quickly. "If you come to this party with me, I'll come to mass with you." Liam said. "If you can get Zayn to come with you, then fine. I'll go to the party." Louis said, knowing it wouldn't happen because Zayn didn't believe in anything. "Deal." Liam said, and he hung up before Louis could respond. 

\--

Louis picked up his phone as it buzzed, carefully book marking his place in his Holy Bible.

Lima: you won. Zayn wont go. 

Louis: I knew I would win. 

Lima: cant believe you of all people would trick me like that. 

Louis: Can't believe you of all people would fall for it. 

Louis smiled at his little joke, getting up and going to grab his dogs leash from the coat rack. "Want to go outside, Brody?" Louis called. He came running, wagging his tale, frantically wiggling as Louis hooked the leash around his collar. He walked him downstairs and to the dog area, letting him do his business, then picking it up with the doggie bag, throwing it away. "You're one of those, huh?" A voice said. Louis turned away, making eye contact with a tall, dressed in all black man with green eyes. He tried not to scoff at the cigarette he was smoking and the tattoos covering every inch visible besides his face, and where there weren't tattoos, there were piercings. But Louis knew that just because this man was degrading his temple, didn't mean he was not a good person. "One of what's?" Louis asked. "One who actually picked up after their dogs." "Of course, he's my responsibility, why wouldn't I?" Louis asked. 

The man just laughed, shaking his head. "What's a pretty young thing like you doing out here alone at this time?" The man asked. "Just letting my dog out." Louis said, ignoring the 'pretty young thing'. "What's your name, princess?" The man asked. "Louis, and I am not a princess." Louis said. "Sure do pout like a princess. You get whatever you want, don't you? Bet whoever your daddy is takes real good care of you like the pretty princess you are." "Look, sir, forgive me, but you're a little old to be talking to a seventeen year old boy, don't you think? You're being a little rude, labeling me as a spoiled brat, when I am in fact, the exact opposite. Please, leave me be, now, I have mass to attend in the morning and it's late." Louis said. "Sure thing, princess. And I'm only eighteen, just so you know. And what church do you go to? Maybe I'll see you there." Louis nearly snorted at that, because sure, this guy went to church. "Saint Vincent, but I have never seen you around, so I wouldn't count on it." Louis said. "Actually, Saint Vincent is a pretty big church. I enjoyed your sermon on Psalms last weekend, by the way. I can tell you're practicing on something that you love." He said, smirking. That shut Louis right up. "Oh. So.. So you do go?" Louis said, feeling his blush spread over his cheeks. "On Sunday's, yes. At least most Sunday's. Sometimes I have some pretty bad hangovers, so I end up sleeping through it, but I won't be drinking tonight." He laughed. "You shouldn't drink, you know. Accidents and diseases can happen." Louis said. "Sure, babe. Go home and get some rest, you've got church in the morning."

\--

Louis didn't see the tall green eyed man at church the next day, he felt kind of disappointed, but only because Louis wanted to help him, he wanted him to stop drinking and smoking and lose the lip and ear rings, and maybe even the tattoos, he wanted him to give his life to God. He frowned as he scanned the crowd for him when the service ended, not seeing him. He went outside an unnecessary amount of times to let Brody out, but didn't see him. He never wanted to see anyone this badly to help them, but he felt that maybe God was pushing him to help the nameless man(at least that's what he told himself, avoiding the thought that he was very handsome). Liam came over with a huge headache, whining at Louis a lot, claiming this wouldn't have happened if Louis were there.

\--

"Will you come to a party yet?" Liam sighed about two weeks later. "Are you and Zayn coming to mass?" Louis asked. "Zayn doesn't want to." Liam pouted. "Then no party." Louis said, giving him a sweet smile. Liam crossed his arms. "Pout all you want. But I promise if you and Zayn agree to come to mass, then I will come to one of your frat party things." Louis said, pushing his glasses up on his nose. 

\--

"Okay. Let's make a deal, Zayn." Liam said. "Listening." Zayn said, taking a drink. "If you can get that girl's number, then I'll let you fuck me. If not, then you have to go to mass with Louis and I on Sunday." Liam said. Zayn smirked, downing the rest of his scotch before going to the girl. It took a while, and at first, the girl's number looked promising, but after a hot minute, Zayn came back with a red handprint on his face. "You know what this means?" Liam asked. "Louis' going partying this weekend."

\--

"Fine, but I'm not drinking." Louis sighed. Liam smiled in victory. "Finally." Louis rolled his eyes, bookmarking his place in the bible and setting it on the coffee table. After Liam went home, Louis took his jeans and T shirt off and crawled into bed, ready to sleep. He was seconds away from falling asleep, feeling like he was slowly falling. His eyes opened wide as a knock came to the door, Brody beginning to bark. Louis groaned, pushing his covers off and walking to the door, knowing it was probably just Liam forgetting something. "Nice way to be greeted." A familiar tall man with green eyes smirked as Louis opened the door. "How may I help you?" Louis asked, ignoring his comment. "Well, I opened my mailbox only to find your mail in there, so I thought I'd do the neighborly thing and bring it to you." He said, handing him the paper. 

"Thank you, um.. I'm sorry, I don't recall your name." Louis said. "Harry Styles. I'm kind of a big deal." He said, winking. "Okay, big deal. Thanks for the mail. I should be getting back to sleep now." Louis said. "Until next time." Harry said, winking again and turning around to leave. Louis closed the door, locking it. He'd be sure to mention his butterflies in confession. 

\--

Four minutes, thirty seven seconds. Louis had been left alone for four minutes and thirty seven seconds now, waiting for Liam to get back, but it was taking longer than expected. Liam had managed to drag Louis into the room with the least people, and he was waiting on the couch while Liam went to go get himself a drink, but he still wasn't back. He held his cross tightly in his hand, praying that he would be okay and for forgiveness for agreeing to coming to this party. After waiting for about fifteen more minutes, Louis decided to go looking for Liam or Zayn, he didn't want to sit here alone anymore, he wanted to go home. He searched through the crowd of sweaty bodies, not able to find either of them in any of the rooms. "Hey, pretty boy, can I get you a drink?" A man with no hair asked, he looked far too old to be at this party. "No, thank you, I'm just looking for someone." Louis said, about to dive back into the crowd, but the man grabbed his wrist. 

"Come on, sweetheart, loosen up, have a drink then come dance with me." He said, smiling. "I'm sorry, sir, I can't do that, I'm here with someone." Louis said, asking lord to forgive his lie. Louis got away from him before he could say another word. Louis was panicking, he needed to find Liam and go home, this was too much, too many drunk perverts and high idiots, slutty boys and girls grinding on each other, the music was too loud. He realized tears were streaming down his cheeks when a hand grabbed his wrist. "Louis?" A voice asked. Louis looked up, eyes meeting with green. "Harry." Louis said, quickly wiping his eyes. "What's wrong? What happened?" Harry asked. "I-I can't find my friends, I-I- I need to go home, I c-can't, I-" "Are you drunk, Louis?" "What? No, I don't- I don't drink." Louis said. "What's your friend's name?" "Liam." "Liam Payne?" Louis' eyes brightened and he nodded, Harry knew who Liam was, Harry could help. "He left with a girl. C'mon, I'll take you home." Harry said, intertwining his fingers with Louis', helping him though the crowd. 

"You don't usually come to these, do you?" Harry asked once they left the house. Louis shook his head, shyly pulling his hand away from Harry's. "Shit, somebody swiped my keys. Fuck." Harry sighed, feeling his pockets. "Oh no, I-" "I know exactly who did it. Stay here, okay, don't leave with anybody." Harry said. Louis nodded, leaning back against Harry's car, crossing his arms to try and keep warm. "Here." Harry said, shedding his jacket, draping it around Louis' shoulders. "Thank you." Louis whispered. He watched as Harry went back inside, then he was alone in the dark. "Beautiful night, isn't it?" Louis jumped, looking around, making eye contact with a tall, kind of chubby man. Louis gave him a small smile. "You're really fit, babe. Looking for some fun?" "I-I.. No, I- I don't.. No." Louis stuttered. "Awe, that's a shame. Was really hoping to take a hot piece of ass like you home with me." He said. Louis gasped as he was grabbed by the hips, jacket falling off of his shoulders onto the ground. 

"Don't want to let you go to waste, do we?" He smirked. "G-get off of me, I-" Louis gasped as the man reached around too grope his bum. He whined as he was pushed against the car, the man leaning down to sloppily kiss his neck and Louis tried to wiggle away. Lord give me strength, lord give me strength, please Lord, forgive me for coming here, please give me strength. Louis tried to push him off, but it was no use, this man was determined to have his way with Louis. Louis finally came to his senses, beginning to cry for help, pushing at the mans chest, trying to get him off. Tears were streaming down his face as he screamed and cried, and he was about to give up when all of the mans weight was lifted from him. "How dare you touch him!" Louis covered his eyes as Harry began to hit the man, knocking him onto the ground. "I'll kill you if you ever even look in his direction." Harry spat, pulling away. "Are you okay? What did he do?" Harry asked, rushing to Louis' side. "I'm fine, I-" Louis sniffed. Harry gently lead him to the other side of the car, opening the door for him. He quickly went back to the driver's side, picking up his jacket and tossing it into the backseat. 

"I'm sorry. I only left you out here cause I didn't want you to see me fight somebody if I did." Harry said, quietly. "Your lip is bleeding." Louis pointed out, quietly. "I rest my case." Harry said, gently wiping the blood away with the collar of his shirt. Louis looked at his tattooed arms, then back up at him as he took his snake bites out. "Can't wear these for a few days." He said, putting the lip rings into the glove compartment. "Doesn't all of that hurt?" Louis asked. "Yeah, but I like it. 'S a good stress reliever." Harry said, starting the car. "So is praying." Louis pointed out. "Yeah, I know. I pray, Louis, I believe in God." Harry said, pulling his shirt down to show him the three crosses on his chest. "Yeah, but you're... You're still sinning by doing that to yourself." Louis said. Harry let out a small laugh, smiling as he began to drive. 

"Sinning is okay, Louis. I sin often, I'm a human being, I'm a sinner, everyone is. God forgives me no matter how many mistakes I make." Harry explained. "Yeah, but-" "Babe, I know how strict you are with religion and the way you live your life. I'm not going to try and change anything about you, please don't try and change me. Plus, I think you could use a new friend, yours obviously aren't very good if they ditch you at a party in a city you aren't familiar with and with people you don't know. You're just lucky I happened to be there. I know I look mean and scary and I can get into some pretty rough fights, maybe I smoke and have sex sometimes, but that doesn't make me a bad person. I'm a sinner, and I'm going to sin again." Harry said. Louis stayed quiet, feeling stupid, looking out the window, trying to keep from crying.

"That guy who was on you. His name is Mark. Not a good guy at all. He would have- he would have taken every ounce of your innocence if I wasn't there." Harry said, quietly. "You're beautiful, Louis. I don't want you going to parties like that, because as soon as someone gets the chance, they'll come at you." "I won't go to anymore of them." Louis said, quietly. "Are you hungry? I'll buy you dinner." Harry said. "No thank you. I want to go home and sleep." Louis said. Harry nodded, continuing to drive. It wasn't long until Harry was walking Louis to his door. "Here's my number. Call or text if you need anything ever." Harry said, pulling out some type of business card. "Thank you. F-for everything." Louis said. "Of course." Harry said. Before Louis could protest, Harry swooped in pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek, making Louis' stomach erupt in butterflies.

As soon as Louis got inside, he locked the door and ran to the shower, scrubbing himself clean from his terrible night that Harry seemed to make better. After he showered, he kneeled down on his knees by his bed and prayed forgiveness and thanking him for everything. When he was done, he crawled into bed, Brody jumping onto the bed with him. Louis laid there for over an hour, trying to fall asleep, but it wasn't working. He got up and went into the bathroom, opening his medicine cabinet to get Benadryl. He closed it, taking it without water, then looking at himself in the mirror, eyes widening. He had dark bruises and bite marks covering his neck. He quickly went to get his phone, thinking of calling Liam, but instead calling Harry. "Hello?" "H-Harry, I n-need your help, I-" "I'm coming." He hung up on Harry before Louis could say anything. Louis unlocked the door, letting Harry in when he got there, tears were streaming down Louis' face. "Look at my neck, I- I can't go to church like this, what do I do?" Louis cried. 

"Babe, hey, calm down, princess, look at me." Harry said. "You don't have to go to church every single service. You've seen this same service three other times this week, it's okay to miss this one, God will forgive you, you can stay home, I'll stay here with you, it's okay." Harry said, cupping his face so that Louis would keep his focus on Harry. "Okay?" Harry asked. Louis sniffed, nodding. "Call your father and tell him something came up and you won't be there tomorrow. He'll be okay with it." Harry said. Louis nodded, reaching up to wipe his eyes. "Do you want me to stay here tonight?" Harry asked. Louis nodded as Harry pulled his hands away from his face. "Call your dad, babe." Louis nodded, going to get his phone and calling his dad. "Hello?" "H-hi, dad. I can't come to church in the morning, something came up." Louis said, a knot of guilt forming in his stomach. "That's fine, son, even I don't come every day, call me if you need anything." "Alright, I'll talk to you later." "Bye, son." 

"I hate to ruin this, but I think you should know this before I spend the night. I have a huge crush on you." Harry said. Louis looked at him, unsure of how to respond. "You don't have to say anything, but if you want me to leave, I will. Do you want me to stay or go?" Harry asked. Louis just nodded, still trying to form words. "Yes you want me to stay or yes you want me to leave?" Harry asked. "Stay, I- stay, just, I-" "We don't have to talk about it, okay?" Harry said. "No, I want to... I want to talk about it. I already know this, God already knows it, and maybe he's disappointed in me, but I must be honest. I don't know you very well, but I know that you fill my stomach with butterflies and you make my heart beat faster, but I can't act on it, I will not act on it, I'm sorry, but to be a priest, I can't date, marry, commit adultery, anything, I-" "Louis, you can be a pastor, the important thing is that you share God with other people. He will forgive you, Louis, you should know that. You're his child, he loves you. He loves me, he loves us the way we are. He loves us no matter what decisions we make, and Louis it's okay to make decisions, every single person on this earth does it, and you can, too. You're not even out of high school yet. Just please go on a date with me, and if you like it keep dating me. If in the end you want to be a priest and not a pastor, then be my guest to leave me. Please just know that God will not be disappointed in you, he will understand. This is not the devil tempting you, this is God saying that it's okay. Maybe I look threatening, but I believe that God forgives me for being gay, for liking you, for wanting to date you, and he'll forgive me for dating you. He accepts me, he accepts you, he loves us, Louis, it's okay." Harry said.

"Harry, I'm sorry, I just.. For now at least, I'd rather stay friends, but we don't even know each other that well, I mean today you got in a fight with some guy who took your keys, and then you hit another man until he couldn't get up, I- what if that's unmanaged anger, what if you one day decide to take that anger out on me? I don't know anything about you, I know that you smoke and drink and get piercings and tattoos and have sex and go to wild frat parties and get in fights, but I also know that you sometimes go to church and you believe and trust in God, I know that you do have a soft side, you're sweet to me and you have a teasing personality, and you're here with me when you could have taken home a pretty girl or guy or something, I don't know, I-" 

"Princess, look at me." Harry said, softly. "I don't drink. I know that I mentioned having hangovers and I go to parties, but I don't drink. I have had sex, but I don't have sex, but not with pointless one night stands. I don't go to wild frat parties on a regular basis, I go every once in a while because sometimes it can be fun if you put yourself out there. I get in fights, yes, but when I do, it's not because they have ugly glasses or because they have a lisp, it's because they're generally a bad person. If someone is trying to get with you after you already said no, that's when I start a fight. When someone calls someone else ugly or fat, bad names in general, especially to their face, that's when I start a fight. When people discriminate against gay people, that's when I start a fight. When people use others for sex or anything of the sort, that's when I start a fight. I know it's a bad habit, but Mark, the guy who gave you these bruises, he deserved so much more than just a few hard hits, but I didn't do too much.  I want you to realize that what I do, I do for a reason. Tattoos and piercings. Like I told you, they're stress relievers and every single tattoo tells some type of story, and I like them, if you don't then I'm sorry, but they're here and they're here to stay. Every single person labels me exactly how you just did, but without the few nice parts you mentioned. I've been through so much shit, more than you can imagine, Louis, and then I find this beautiful, amazing boy, one who's a good person, and then I tell him I like him, but then he labels me as some trouble-making asshole. So you know what? Forget it. I'm going home." 

Louis stood there in tears as he watched Harry leave, because what else as he supposed to do? He had trouble sleeping that night, he wasn't exactly okay, and he kept checking his phone to see if Harry maybe texted him, but he didn't. 

\--

"Louis, I'm so sorry." "Liam, I forgive you, but I don't think we should be friends anymore. You left me there without a way home, without a person I knew, with a whole bunch of drunk perverts." Louis said. "Louis, I-" "I think you should leave." 

\--

Louis was heartbroken. He laid in bed a lot of the time, he only went to mass on Saturday because Harry was right, why watch the same sermon over and over again? He didn't know what to do, he had never been in this situation, he'd never lost a friend, never got left by a crush because he'd never actually had a crush before Harry. He'd never been so sad. His faith was slowly fading, he didn't pray as often as usual, he didn't go to confession, he wasn't eating well. He looked at himself in the mirror and frowned, he didn't like the way he looked, he felt fat, he felt ugly. He didn't know why he felt this way, he barely even knew Harry. He was depressed. He'd fallen into the devil's trap, so foolish of him. He didn't want to go anywhere or do anything, he dreaded going back to school when summer was over, he just wanted to be home alone in bed. 

\--

"Brody just- ugh." Louis sighed at the whining dog. Louis pushed his blanket off, not bothering to put a shirt on as he grabbed his leash. He took him outside, letting him off of the leash to do his business. Louis sighed, sitting down on a bench as Brody ran around, deciding the poor dog had been trapped inside for days with less than five minutes of fresh air a day, so this was okay. Well it was okay until Harry sat next to him, cigarette between his teeth. "You didn't have to stop talking to me, you know. I was just upset that one night. You were supposed to comfort me the next day." Harry said, flicking the ash off of his fag. Louis didn't say anything, eyes trained on his dog. "I'm sorry for running off like that. I shouldn't have." Harry said. Louis shrugged. "It's whatever." Louis said, quietly. "You're pretty, Louis." Harry said. 

Louis frowned, looking at his lap. "Why didn't you come over or call me or something? I thought you hated me. I'm not good at friendships, I'm even worse at romance. I like you, okay? I want to date you, you've convinced me that God will forgive me, if there even is a god, I've never been in a relationship, and I want to date you." Louis said. "Louis, did you just- did you just doubt your God?" Harry asked. "No. I said I want to date you." Louis said. "Look at me." Louis did as Harry said. "What happened to you?" Harry asked. "Yes I love God, and I go to mass once a week instead of four times. I enjoy being at home." Louis said. "So you're telling me that you want to date me, and you have full confidence that God will be okay with that?" "That's right." Louis said. "Then Louis, will you go on a damn date with me?" Harry asked. "Yeah. I'd like that very much." Louis said. 

\--

"You're 17, going on 18. You've never been in a relationship, meaning you've never had sex or anything." Harry said. "I've never orgasmed, Harry. Spilling my seed is a sin." Louis said. "Oh goodness, I've got a lot to show you." Harry breathed, pushing his hair out of his face. Louis rolled his eyes, leaning back in his chair. "We're not having sex." Louis said. "And this is why you've yet to have a boyfriend. Before now, at least." Harry snorted, gently intertwining their fingers together. "You're so beautiful, Louis." Harry sighed. Louis smiled, shyly looking away. "You ready to go home?" Harry asked. "Yeah, but.. W-will you stay? At least for a little while?" Louis asked. "Of course." Harry said, smiling. 

\--

Harry gently touched Louis' cheek, smiling. "You're beautiful." Harry whispered. "You're-" "Shut up." Harry laughed, leaning down to kiss him. Louis' breath hitched, hands resting on Harry's chest, eyes closed, gently kissing back even though he didn't know how. "Took us fourteen dates to finally kiss." Harry whispered, pulling away. "You've been counting." Louis giggled. "Of course I have." Harry said, smiling down at him. "Kiss me again, I can't reach you from here." Louis said. Harry laughed, leaning down to kiss him again, eyes falling shut. Louis really loved kissing. It was by far the naughtiest thing he'd ever done, but he loved it so much. Sometimes Harry would stay the night, and in the morning Louis would peck his lips until he woke up, and then they would make out until one of them needed to pee or something. Louis didn't tell Harry that it made him all hot and bothered, he just kissed him cause it made him happy. They were officially boyfriends and they did all sorts of things together. They would lay in the grass at night and look at the stars, they'd go see movies, go on walks, shop, eat, sleep, the only things they didn't do was anything near sex and showering together. Harry got Louis all kinds of gifts, and Louis always felt bad because he couldn't afford to get Harry gifts like that. 

\--

Louis loosened his collar, plopping down on his couch and sighing. He'd just gotten back from confession and he felt so guilty for being with Harry. So when Harry called, Louis didn't answer, and he didn't answer his texts either. He locked the door and went to bed, and stayed in bed until the next day when he needed something to drink. He got up and got water, grabbing his phone, seeing that he only had one missed call from Harry and two messages. He frowned, opening the messages, they weren't anything but 'have you seen my charger?' and 'never mind, I found it'. No questions on where he was and if he was okay, so Louis just tossed his phone back on to the bedside table and went back to bed. Except he couldn't sleep. He was lonely, he wanted Harry to hold him, to whisper sweet words to him. But when Harry finally called him, Louis didn't answer, he ignored it because he felt so guilty. This went on for three days. 

Louis didn't respond or answer or anything, he completely avoided Harry, he even took Brody to a different spot than usual. Harry was naturally worried, but he didn't want to show up at Louis' apartment, but after three days, Harry couldn't help it. He knocked on the door and waited, hoping to be greeted by his beautiful boyfriend. When the door opened, Harry was almost in tears because he missed Louis so much. "I called, but-" "I know." Louis said. "Have I done something wrong, I-" "You haven't done anything wrong." Louis said. "What's going on then? Why won't you return my calls?" "Because I have done wrong." Louis whispered. "W-what did you do?" Harry asked. "I had... I had a dream. About us... Doing.. Well, you know. And I-I know that I actually want that, but Harry I can't do that, I'm too afraid, it would be so selfish of me to-" 

"Louis, we don't have to have sex. If you don't want to have sex, that's fine, just don't avoid me." Harry said. "But I do want to have sex. With you, I mean, I- I understand that God will forgive me, but-" "Louis, is this because you don't want to have sex or is it because you don't want to be with me?" Harry asked. "What? Harry, I- of course I want to be with you, I- Harry, I-" Louis stuttered. "Maybe I should leave ." Harry said. "No, stay, stay, please stay, I- please." Louis said, quickly hugging him so that he couldn't leave. "I've missed you." Louis whispered as Harry wrapped his arms around Louis. "I've missed you, too, princess." Harry said, pressing a soft kiss to his head. "Maybe... Maybe if we.. If we don't have sex, w-we can do other stuff." Louis said, shyly. "We can do whatever you want, Louis." Harry said. Louis pulled away, looking up at him, gently pulling him down by the collar to kiss him. "Louis, I have something to tell you, I-" Harry started, pulling away from their kiss. Louis' heart stopped as he looked at Harry. "What is it?" Louis asked. "I-I... I've been lying to you." Harry said. Louis slowly let go of his shirt. "About what?" Louis asked. 

"Well I haven't been lying, but I did lie about something, but without that something we wouldn't be together." Harry said. "W-what is it?" Louis asked. "Remember the night of the party?" Louis nodded. "Zayn and I made a bet. He said that if I... If I could get you to go home with me, he'd give me 50£ so I said yes. I didn't lose my keys, and I had Mark go out there to mess with you, he wasn't supposed to give you the hickeys or actually do anything bad, and I hit him because he owed me anyway, and when I went inside, Zayn paid me and I had him bust my lip so that you'd think I got in a fight. He thought that we were going to sleep together, and I told him that we didn't, I gave him the money back and then we started dating, and please don't- please don't leave me Louis, I- I really ended up liking you. I've never actually been in a real relationship, I- and now I am and it's with you and you're the most amazing person I've ever met and you're so beautiful and I'd do anything for you and I'm so sorry." 

Louis stayed quiet, looking at his feet. "Do you forgive me, princess?" Harry asked after a while. "I forgive you. But I don't think we should see each other anymore." Louis whispered. "Louis, I-" "Please leave, Harry." "But Louis, I-" "HARRY, GET OUT! ALL I WAS TO YOU WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MEANINGLESS SEX, ALL I WAS WAS A BET! I didn't ask for any of this! I have faith in God and I'm a good person, but my entire life, people have treated me like crap, like I'm a piece of meat, like I'm useless! So much has happened to me that you don't know about, Harry, why don't I want to have sex? Not because God won't forgive me, but because when I was a kid, my mom would sell my body and man after man would come in and rape me, they would use me for pleasure, they would hurt me and make me bleed and scream and cry! Five years later, here I am, standing with a guy that I'm in absolute love with that was just going to use me!" Louis yelled, tears beginning to fall down his cheeks. "I have girl thighs, I have a girl bum, I'm curvy and I have girl hips, so men think it's okay to just use me for their own selfish needs. Why couldn't you just help me get home because I was at a party alone, why couldn't you just take me home because you liked me? You took me home to have sex with me when you knew damn well I wouldn't have had sex with you for all the money in the world! I can't believe you, I-I trusted you." Louis cried. 

"I love you." Harry whispered, a tear falling down his cheek. "I love you so much, I- I know you won't except it, just please, Louis, you've changed me, I- I love you and I would never do anything to harm you, just please, Louis, don't leave me." Harry pleaded. Louis wiped his eyes, looking away. "I would take every ounce of pain that anyone has ever caused you and make it hurt me instead if I could, and I'll be honest to you no matter what, I'll do whatever you need me to do, I just.. Whatever you tell me to do next, I'll do it, I promise." Harry said. Louis didn't say anything, he just looked anywhere but Harry eyes. "Louis." Harry whispered, stepping closer to him. "Kiss me, please." Louis said, finally looking up at him. 

Harry was quick to do so, cupping his cheek with one hand, placing the other on his hip. Louis threw his arms around Harry's neck, pushing himself up on his tip toes to meet Harry in the middle. Harry gently moved his other hand to Louis' hip, kissing him hard. "Haz." Louis breathed into the kiss, tangling his fingers in Harry's hair. Louis gasped, pulling away as Harry moved his hands to squeeze Louis' bum. "Lou, I'm sorry, I- I didn't mean to, I wasn't thinking." Harry said, pulling his hands away. Louis shook his head, grabbing his hands and pulling them back to his bum. "It's okay." Louis breathed, pulling him back down by his collar to kiss him. Harry gently groped his bum, loving the way it felt in his hands. "Haz, c-can we- I-" Louis whined, pulling away. "What do you need, baby?" Harry asked. "You, I- bedroom." Louis said, shyly. "Are you sure? I don't want to do anything that you'll regret." Harry said. "Please, Harry." Louis said, leaning in to kiss Harry's neck. Harry lifted Louis off the ground, carrying him to Louis' bedroom as Louis kissed his neck, fists clutching Harry's shirt. 

"Tell me you're okay with this." Harry said, gently setting him down on the bed. "I'm okay with, I- please, please Harry, please, I- please make love to me, I-" Louis begged, reaching to take Harry's shirt off. Harry chuckled, pulling his shirt off for him and dropping it on the floor. "How do I-" "Just take your clothes off, baby, don't worry, I'll help you." Harry whispered, gently pulling Louis' shirt over his head and throwing it aside. "You're so pretty, baby." He breathed, leaning down to briefly kiss Louis. "It takes a minute, okay? You've never- you've never done anything like this, so it's going to take a bit to get used to the feeling." Harry said, gently pulling Louis' pants off of him. "Look at these pretty thighs, Lou." Harry whispered, gently placing his hands on Louis' thighs as if they were going to burn him. "Harry, please, do something." Louis whined, almost panting. Harry leaned down, pressing a small kiss on his left thigh. "Gonna take your underwear off, okay?" Harry said. Louis shyly nodded his head, covering his eyes in embarrassment as he felt Harry pulling his underwear off. "You're beautiful." Harry whispered, leaning up to kiss him, Louis whining and whimpering into the kiss without Harry even touching him. Harry pulled away, smirking at how hard Louis was, because he never thought he'd see Louis in the position.

"Do you have any cocoa butter?" Harry asked. "I d-don't know, I-" "Stay here, okay? Don't do anything until I get back." Harry said, getting up to go his bathroom, searching for cocoa butter. He finally found some in the very back of his cabinet, he almost sprinted back to Louis. "I'm going to eat you out, okay? It'll make it easier for when I stretch you out." Harry said. Louis nodded, looking up at him, so ready for something to happen. "Can you lay on your stomach for me, princess?" Harry asked, gently rubbing his thighs. Louis nodded, flipping over, whining as his dick touched the bed. "Don't grind, I don't want you cumming too early." Harry said, gently putting his hands on Louis' arse. He carefully and slowly exposed Louis' clean hole. Louis had obviously shaved or waxed or something, not one single hair was anywhere. Harry leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to his bum, before moving and swiping his tongue over Louis' hole. "Oh." Louis whimpered, trying to stay still. Harry leaned back in, gently licking at Louis, seeing what he liked, but it seemed that he liked all of it, he was moaning and whining at everything Harry did. Harry pushed his tongue as deep as he could, he didn't stop even when his jaw began to hurt, because hearing the such sinful noises coming from Louis was worth every second. "Please, Harry, I-I need more, I-" Louis whined, pushing back against Harry's tongue, fisting the sheets in his hands. Harry didn't respond, continuing to lick into him, so messy and good, Louis almost couldn't take it, he'd never felt anything like this, never imagined it could be this good, he couldn't imagine how Harry's cock would feel. Louis was begging for more, Harry had only been rimming him for three or four minutes and Louis needed so much more, he needed Harry. 

"Tell me what you need, baby." Harry said, pulling away from his hole. "N-need fingers, I- please." Louis breathed, grinding his hips forward into the bed and gasping at the new feeling. "Turn around." Harry said. Louis didn't answer or comply, he just ground his hips into the bed, moaning at the new sensation. "Louis." Harry barked. Louis jumped, stilling his hips and looking up at him. "Turn over, baby." Harry said softly. Louis did as he said, watching Harry curiously as he scooped up cocoa butter in his hand, lubing up three fingers. "You're gonna... You're gonna put all three of those in me?" Louis whimpered. "Gonna get you as ready as possible for my cock. It's big, baby." Harry said, gently pressing the tip of his middle finger against Louis' hole. "Ready?" Harry asked, looking at him. Louis looked up at him with begging eyes. "W-will you kiss me w-while you... please?" Louis asked. Harry chuckled, leaning down to kiss him, pushing his tongue into his mouth. He gently and slowly pushed his finger in, continuing to kiss Louis even when Louis stopped kissing back, far too out to think about it. Louis was breathing hard when Harry's finger was finally all the way in. Harry had begun kissing his neck and chest, leaving a dark mark on his collarbone, slowly pulling his finger to the tip, then pushing it back in. 

Louis gasped, gripping Harry's bicep tight as Harry crooked his finger, twisting it around. "Louis? Hey, look at me." Harry said, stopping his movements. Louis didn't respond, only grinding his hips down. "Louis, look at me." Harry said, louder, more demanding. Louis opened his eyes, looking up at him. "We're going to have a safe color, okay? If you need me to stop, say orange, okay? If I ask you what color and you can't tell me, then I'm going to stop, okay?" Harry said. Louis nodded, beginning to grind down again. "What color?" Harry asked. "O-orange, color's orange, please." Louis breathed. Harry nodded, starting to move his finger again, leaning down to sink his teeth into Louis' right thigh. Louis let out a beautiful, high pitched whine as Harry pushed his index finger in with his middle finger, gently twisting his wrist to loosen Louis' far too tight hole. "Oh my." Louis gasped as Harry scissored his fingers, and Harry almost died laughing because his Louis was so innocent, he wouldn't even say 'God' in bed. "P-please keep going, I-" Louis whined. Harry crooked his fingers, purposely missing his prostate, knowing that Louis would be pushed over the edge in half a second. By Louis' moans and cries, Harry knew anyone could tell that one, he had never masturbated or orgasmed, or two, he was a really grand actor.

"Are you ready for another one?" Harry asked, pumping his fingers in and out of Louis. "Please, please, Haz, please." Louis moaned, reaching up to tangle his fingers in his own hair. "Tell me the color and I'll give you the last finger." Harry said. "Th-the color is- I-is... It's orange, I- color's orange." Harry smirked, slowly adding the last finger. Louis was breathing fast, fast and frantic, Harry kind of wondered if they shouldn't continue. "Harry, go." He snapped, pushing back against his fingers. Harry twisted his fingers, beginning to pump them in and out, deep and fast and Louis was nearly screaming. "Harry, d-don't stop, oh, yes." Louis moaned, beginning to pretty much ride his fingers. Louis felt so, so good, he didn't know what to do, where to look, where to put his hands, he was far past being embarrassed from the sinful noises he was letting out, he needed Harry inside him. "Please, Harry, please, please." Louis whined, gasping as Harry suddenly twisted his hand. "Please what, baby?" Harry asked. "I need- I need you, I-" "You need me to what?" Harry asked. "Harry, just.. Just... Fuck me!" Louis cried. 

"You got it, princess." Harry said, pulling his fingers out, making Louis whine out. Harry wiped his fingers on the duvet then reached to unbutton his jeans, taking them off a one swift movement. "H-Harry, c-can I... Can I..." Louis whimpered, pushing himself to sit up, reaching to pull Harry's boxers down. "Can you what, baby?" Harry asked. Louis didn't respond, looking at Harry's cock in awe. Louis hesitantly reached up to wrap a hand around it, glancing up at Harry watching him, then back to his dick. Louis gulped before leaning in to lick the precum dribbling from the tip, licking his lips afterwards. He leaned it, taking the tip into his mouth, gently sucking, then taking more into his mouth, scared that he was doing it wrong. "You think you can take more, baby?" Harry asked, gently running his fingers through Louis' hair. Louis closed his eyes, pushing himself further to take more for Harry. "Just like that, baby." Harry sighed. Louis sucked as he began to bob his head, going as far down as he could every time he went back down.

Louis really loved it. He was so eager to take more every time, he loved it when Harry's cock hit the back of his throat, he loved choking on it. Louis loved the way it felt in his mouth, he didn't want to stop, his own throbbing dick and empty hole long forgotten. "Louis, baby, stop." Harry said after a while, pulling away from Louis, who whined as he did. "Haz." Louis whined, reaching for Harry. "What color?" Harry asked, gently pushing Louis back onto his back. "Orange." Louis whispered. "Are you ready?" Harry asked, spreading Louis' legs. Louis nodded, bracing himself for Harry's dick, so so ready. "I love you." Harry said, leaning down to kiss him. "I love you, t-oh, fuck." Louis gasped as Harry pushed in all in one swift, gentle movement. Harry pulled away from the kiss, pressing his forehead against Louis'. "Tell me when you're ready, okay?" Harry whispered. Louis didn't respond, hands reaching up to tangle in his curls. Harry stayed still, waiting for the okay, letting Louis gently tug at his hair. "Okay." Louis whispered. "You sure?" Harry whispered back, pressing a small kiss to his nose. "Please." Louis whimpered, gasping as he ground his hips down. 

Harry placed one hand on Louis' hip as he began to pull out before slamming back in. Louis let out a loud whine, eyes flying open. "O-oh, please, Haz, p-please." Louis moaned, moving his hands to grab the sheets. Harry repeated his movements, gaining a steady rhythm. "H-Harry, oh, please, I-" Louis moaned, he felt so good, so full. Harry grunted as he slammed his hips into Louis, reaching to grab his other hip, leaning up as he thrusted into Louis. Louis could barely breathe, he'd never felt anything near this, he never knew it could be this amazing, he didn't think he could take it anymore. "P-p-please, I- harder, P-please, harder Harry, please." Louis begged, arching his back. Harry did as he said, fucking him harder, slamming his cock into the tight heat hard. Louis let out a gasp, losing his breath, unable to breathe or speak as Harry fucked into him. "You're so pretty, baby. Taking my cock so well." Harry said, thrusting into him. "Color, baby, what's the color?" Harry asked, noticing his sudden silence and his chest heaving. "Baby, tell me the color!" Harry demanded. Louis sucked in a breath before pushing it out, breathing hard and fast. "It- it's orange, it's orange, fuck me, shit, Harry, fuck me!" Louis cried. Harry sped his thrusts, fucking into him relentlessly, deciding it was about time to find his prostate. He changed his angle, thrusting into him hard. "THERE, OH GOD, THERE!" Louis screamed, gasping as Harry continued pounding into that spot because what was that. 

He felt as if he was floating, all he could feel or process what was happening down there, what was happening in his bum, then suddenly in his dick. He let out a shout of Harry's name, at least he thought he did, because when he went to shout, he heard nothing. "Louis, color, fuck, what's the color?" Harry asked, as he continued to pound into Louis after Louis had painted his own stomach white. "Color, Lou, tell me the color." Harry said, pounding into him two more times before filling him with his seed. He stayed still, buried in Louis, breathing hard. "Louis, what's your color?" Harry asked, gaining his head back. Louis didn't respond, eyes closed, chest visibly rising then falling. Harry gently pulled out, reaching down to grab his shirt, wiping Louis' stomach off. "Baby, look at me. What's your color?" Harry asked, gently touching Louis' cheek. Louis opened his eyes, looking at Harry. "What's your color, princess?" Harry asked. Louis didn't say anything, looking up at Harry. "Baby, I need you to talk to me. You with me?" Harry asked. Louis didn't respond, still breathing hard. Harry picked him up, moving him to get his head to a pillow, then crawling into the bed next to him, wrapping an arm around him, waiting for Louis to come back down. 

"Orange." Louis whispered after a while. Harry let out a small chuckle, moving to kiss him. "How was it?" Harry asked. "I love you." Louis whispered, cuddling into him. "Mhm." Harry hummed, pulling the duvet over both of them. It wasn't long until Louis was asleep on Harry's chest, softly snoring. "Louis? Louis, are you here?" A voice called out. Harry furrowed his eyebrows, looking at the door as the voice came closer. "Lou- What on earth is going on here?!" Louis jolted awake, pulling away from Harry's chest, sitting up. "D-dad, what are you doing here, I-" "Who is this? Why are you in bed with him?" "D-d-dad, I- this... This is Harry, I- he's..." "It's reeks of sex in here, what do you think you're doing, boy? Is this why you haven't been coming to church? To sell your soul for sex with another man? I'm disgusted, Louis, I didn't raise you like this." He spat. "Sir, this isn't what you think, we-" "Shut your mouth, boy! I was coming to give you rent, Louis, but forget it! I'm done helping you, no son of mine is going to choose some faggot over God." He spat and turned around to leave. Louis was crying, he didn't know what to do. He stood up, wincing at the pain in his bum, quickly getting some underwear on. He turned around, seeing Harry getting dressed. "W-what are you doing?" Louis asked. 

"I'm going home." Harry said, buttoning his jeans. "W-what? I- why are you going home, I- are you coming back? I need you here, I-" "Louis, look. You're hot, you were a good fuck, maybe the best I've had. I'm sorry about your dad and everything, but this is what I do. I'm surprised you fell for my whole speech, I thought you were smarter than that. There is no God, Louis. There's no Satan or Angels or demons, it's all just stupid shit to make you feel like you're not alone in this universe, but you are, we all are." Harry said. Louis was dumbfounded, tears streaming down his cheeks in rivers. "I don't love you, Louis, you're not special to me, you never were." Harry said. Louis' heart actually hurt. He was heart broken. This time, it was real. He wasn't just sad. He was broken.

\--

"Come on, Brody." Louis said, grabbing the leash. Louis had moved out of his apartment, not being able to afford it anymore without his dad. He lived in this shitty one room apartment, just a room with a bathroom connected to it, he had to sell a lot of his things, he threw out his bibles, his crosses, all of it, he just had his clothes, a bed, a dresser, a TV, a mini fridge and a microwave on top of it and his dog supplies. He kept all of the gifts Harry gave to him, he couldn't help it, Harry was his first and only love, Louis felt as if he was always going to love him, no matter how much Harry ruined his life. He was alone. No friends, no family, he stopped going to church completely, he decided God was bullshit. He didn't eat, he barely slept, all he had was his dog. 

Harry wasn't very happy, either. He went to Louis' apartment, only to discover that Louis no longer lived there. He didn't want to call him, knowing that Louis wouldn't answer him after what Harry did to him. Harry was in love with Louis. He regretted leaving like that, he regretted saying the things he said, but there was nothing he could do about it. 

\--

"Shit." Louis muttered as Brody ran, Louis losing grip on his leash. "Brody!" Louis shouted, chasing after him. Louis watched as Brody turned the corner, trying to keep up with him. His eyes widened as he heard a yelp, and he was sprinting now. "Brody!" Louis cried, running to him as the car sped away without even stopping to make sure the dog was okay. "Brody!" Louis cried again, scooping his heavy body into his arms and holding him close, tears streaming down his cheeks. "Oh my god, are- is he breathing?" A voice asked and Louis didn't have the strength to look up. "No, my boy's dead, he- he's dead, what do I do, he's dead." Louis sobbed. "Let me help, please let me help, I can help you bury him, I-" "I live in an apartment." Louis sniffed. "Then... To the humane society, they'll take him, you can... You can get his ashes, I- please let me help you." She said. "I can't afford it, I can't-" "I'll pay, I just... I cant stand to see anyone like this, please let me help." She said. Louis finally looked up, wiping his eyes. "My name is Gemma." She said. "I'm Louis." Louis sniffed. "Come on, I've got a tarp in the boot of my car, we can set him on that." She said, popping the trunk with her key. Louis nodded, lifting Brody's lifeless body up and carrying him to her car. "I'll help you, Louis. Don't you worry." Gemma said, hugging him when he closed the boot. 

\--

Gemma and Louis became friends. Louis felt nice having a friend again, having someone to talk to, but when she wasn't around, he was lonely without Brody. They hung out a lot, she was a sweet girl and he was so grateful to have a friend again. "My mom is getting married. I know you're gay, but you should be my date to her wedding." "Alright." Louis said. And that brings Louis to where he was now- wearing a suit in front of Gemma's bathroom mirror as she did his hair. "My brother is gay. He kinda looks like me, but a boy. Don't know if he's your type, but you'll probably have to sit with him while I'm helping my mom get ready for the ceremony." Gemma told him. Louis just nodded, he was nervous and he didn't know why. "You look beautiful, Gemma. Just saying." Louis said as they were leaving. 

\--

"Styles-Twist wedding? Shit, Gemma, your last name is Styles?" Louis asked, feeling panicked. "Louis, why are you freaking out?" Gemma asked, placing her hands on his shoulders. "Your brother... Your brother is Harry Styles." Louis said, hands beginning to shake. "Yeah? You know him?" Gemma asked. "I'm sorry, Gemma, I can't be here, I have to go home." Louis said. "What? Louis, look at me. You owe me big time, you are not leaving this wedding. I don't care what Harry did to you at this moment in time, you aren't leaving or so god help me, I will end you. Do you hear me?" Gemma said, eyes becoming scary and God girls were crazy. "I hear you." Louis said, gulping because he was going to see Harry today, it was inevitable, it had only been two months since the whole thing happened and Louis was so afraid. 

"I have to go into my mom's room, I don't know whether or not you want to see Harry, but he's in the main chapel. So either go see him, or go hide out in the restroom, I'll text you when I'm done." Gemma said. "Okay." Louis said. He quickly went to the restroom, locking his stall and sitting on the toilet, closing his eyes and waiting for Gemma to be done. "You need to get your shit together, Harry. You need to find a guy and settle down, you need to find a steady job." "I have a job. And I had a guy, I just blew it." A deep voice muttered and oh, how Louis missed that voice. "What did you do?" "I told him I didn't love him and left after we had sex. I'm sure he's great without me. He was- He was the most amazing person I'd ever met and I- I fucked up more than I've ever fucked up. I fell in love with him. I'm still in love with him, I haven't seen or heard from him in two months." "Karma's a bitch. I'm going to go see Robin. I'll see you later, Harry." 

Louis couldn't help it. He had to say something. He opened the stall, wiping the tears from his eyes. Harry glanced up in the mirror before whipping around, heart beating fast. "Louis." Harry breathed. "I can't fucking believe you, Harry." Louis said, wiping his eyes. "Louis." Harry repeated, taking a step closer, but Louis pushed him. "You're such a fucking- you- I-" Louis cried, pushing him again. "Hit me, Louis, punch me in the face as hard as you can as many times as you need to, I deserve it." Harry said. "I don't- I don't want to hit you." Louis said, wiping his eyes for just about the twentieth time. "Louis, it's true. All of that I just said, I- it's true and I'm so sorry, I don't deserve your forgiveness, I've been so miserable, just-" "Harry, you ruined my life." Louis said. "How can I fix it?" Harry whispered. "You broke my heart. You left me at my home alone, with no family, no friends, no one but my dog. You made me realize that God is a whole big lie, and now I live in this shitty apartment and my dog got hit by a car and so I'm all alone there, I mean Gemma comes over a few times a week, but I mean- you broke my heart. I miss my life the way it was. I miss Liam, I miss church, I miss my dad, I miss Brody, I miss you. I miss you so much." Louis said. "C-can... Can I come back to you? I'll do anything, I- please give me another chance, I'll be the best boyfriend in the world, I'll never hurt you, I'll never leave you, please, I-" Harry begged, almost crying. 

Louis sniffed, looking away. "You'll never be lonely. I'll help you, I'll be by you every step of the way, I'll never leave you unsatisfied, I'll make you feel like you're a princess, like you're the most important person in this world, because you are. I love you so much." Harry said, hesitantly stepping closer to him. "Will you tell me the truth?" Louis asked. "I'll tell you everything you want to know." Harry said. "How many people did you sleep with after me?" "I-I... I met this boy named Travis. We went on one date and he invited me in and he started kissing me, and I just couldn't do it, I didn't want it, I pushed him away and he was offended and he asked if I didn't like him and I told him no, I didn't like him because I was in love w-with you, and I left. That's the closest thing that's happened to sex." Harry said, it was completely true. "You're going to hurt me again." Louis said. "No, Louis, I'll do everything I can to make you happy, I love you, I don't care if we never have sex , I-" "Woah, woah, woah, never have sex again?" Louis asked and Harry couldn't help but smile. "I'll give you everything you need and want." Harry said. 

"You're an asshole, you know." Louis whispered. "I know." Harry said. Louis looked at him, smiling because Harry looked so lost without him, he could see it in his hopeful eyes. "I love you. I love you so much, I-" Harry said, putting his hands on Louis' hips. Louis reached up to gently touch his cheek, before pulling his hand away. "I hate you, Harry." Louis whispered. "What?" Harry asked, stomach flipping. "You ruined my stupid life." Louis said, wiping his eyes. "Do you hate me? Like really hate me?" Harry asked, nervously. "Yes, I really hate you, I don't- I- H-Harry, are you... Are you crying?" Louis asked, reaching up to wipe Harry's tears away. "You hate me." Harry whispered. "Harry, I love you. Of course I love you, I mean... I hate what you did to me. But I love you, don't cry, I love you." Louis said, wiping Harry's tears. "Please take me back." Harry whispered. Louis nodded, placing his hands on Harry's chest. "Oh, thank God." Harry sighed, leaning down to kiss him. "Louis, I've been blowing up your phone, it- woah." A voice said. "Gemma, get out of here, this is the men's room." Harry said, pulling away from Louis. "Harry, you are not stealing my date, Louis is mine tonight, I don't care what's going on between you two, you can resume it later, come on, Louis." Gemma said, waving Louis to follow her. "I'm sorry, Haz, I'm gonna go with her." Louis said, looking up at him. "Okay, be good, I'll see you after the ceremony." Harry said, leaning down to steal one more kiss. 

\--

"I've never been to such a beautiful wedding." Louis said, looking up at Harry. "Haven't noticed. Too busy looking at you. You look so gorgeous all dressed up, makes me want to marry you." Harry said, smiling down at him. "Your an asshat." Louis scoffed before giggling. "This morning I was miserable. Didn't think I'd be dancing with the love of my life at my mom's wedding tonight." Harry said. "My mom already really likes you. Could already tell the second you met her. How did you meet Gemma?" Harry asked. "She helped me when Brody got killed. Took me to the humane society and paid for him to get cremated. I mean, of course I paid her back as soon as I had the money. I didn't know she was your sister until today." He said. "I'm sorry. I wish I could've done something to help. I suppose it's my fault he died, too." Harry said, frowning. "That's not true." Louis said. "It wasn't anyone's fault but the person who hit him." "Do you want a dog? I'll get you a dog. I mean I guess no one can really replace Brody, but I mean you should at least make a new best friend for when I'm at work." Harry said. "I'd love a dog, it's just.. I don't want you to pay for it." Louis said. "Move in with me." Harry said, suddenly. "What?" Louis asked. "Please move in with me. I want to wake up next to you every morning and fall asleep next to you every night. I want to cook you breakfast and come home for lunch then cook you dinner. We can.. We can get a house, not an apartment, we can have a backyard for the dog we'll get or.. Or we'll get a pig!" Harry said, smiling at him. "Haz, no, I don't want to move in with you, not right now at least. I love sleeping next to you, but like, some nights I like being alone, I'm not ready to move in together yet." Louis said. "Oh." Harry said, frowning. "I'm sorry."  
Louis said. "No, that's okay, I'm just... I'm so happy that we're together again." Harry said. Louis nodded, leaning forward to rest his head on Harry's chest. "I love you, Louis Tomlinson." Harry whispered, pressing a kiss to Louis' head. "I love you, too." 

They danced for a while, even with the fast music until Anne came along and asked Louis to dance with her, which he happily did. "A few months ago, Harry wouldn't stop talking about you, then suddenly he stopped, but now you're here. Thought it was a little curious when I saw that you were Gemma's plus one and not Harry's. "Well.. We kind of stopped talking and then I met Gemma and didn't realize they were siblings." "I guess that was God's way of saying you two belong together. Assuming you believe in destiny." Anne said. "I honestly didn't think about it like that." Louis said, smiling. "Just.. He can make some pretty stupid choices sometimes. He causes problems, too, but only when he gets off of his medicine, which he usually does because he always forgets to call in for a new prescription when he only has a few pills left, because it takes around five business days to ship. It makes him do and say stupid things that he regrets as soon as he gets back on his pills." Anne explained. "What.. What does he take pills for?" Louis asked. 

"Oh dear, I didn't know he hasn't told you." Anne said. "You can't tell him I said anything, okay? And please don't leave him, it isn't his fault. It's just his mental health, I'm so proud of him for not using it as an excuse. You know that he has all of those tattoos, right? Most of those tattoos cover scars, he used to do some major self harming, he had to go to the hospital because he almost bled out while he was home alone for the night, he tried to kill himself. After he was better, still in the hospital, he told me he didn't want people to see his arm when he went to school, so I suggested a tattoo, and wasn't so sure at first, but then I guess he decided it wouldn't be so bad, so I paid for him to get his first tattoo. That was when he was 16. As soon as he turned 17, he moved out and I found out that he started hurting himself again, but I didn't see him often, but every time I did, he'd come back with four or five more tattoos. I guess he just liked the piercings, maybe the pain of them, I don't know. He's extremely bipolar, has MDD. When his father left, he had this imaginary friend. His name was Aaron, and he talked to him from the age of 5 all the way to 14. It wasn't an imaginary friend, I took him to the doctor, he was diagnosed with schizophrenia, and he has to take four different pills for it, and a few weeks after he started taking the pills, Aaron disappeared. He's only gotten off of those pills twice, the first time was the time he tried to kill himself, and the second, wasn't too long ago, he didn't tell me exactly what happened, though.

"He takes about eight or nine pills once in the morning, once in the evening. He's very good with his medication, though. He goes to therapy, he says it doesn't help him, but he told me he'd go if it made me happy. I really hope this doesn't change your mind about being with him, I- he loves you so much, Louis, I don't think he's ever been so happy as he was a few months ago." Anne said. "Of course it isn't going to change my mind. I'm so proud of him, I would have never known." Louis said. "May I steal my wife from you?" Robin asked, smiling at Louis. "Feel free." Louis smiled. "It was nice talking to you, Louis. You take care of my boy." Anne said, pulling Louis into hug her. "Always." Louis said. "Bye, Louis." "Bye." Louis said, watching as she left. He went back to his table, sitting next to Harry. "How'd it go?" Harry asked. "Good. I love you." Louis said. "I love you, too." 

\--

"Hey, baby." Louis said, walking into Harry's bedroom. Harry didn't say anything, just pulling the covers back and patting the bed next to him. "Get up, Haz, come shopping with me, I need some jeans and underwear, but I want to make sure you like the way they look on my bum." Louis said, setting his phone down. "Not in the mood to shop. Can we go tomorrow?" Harry asked, quietly. "I guess." Louis said, taking his shoes off, climbing into bed with Harry. "What's wrong, baby?" Louis asked. "Nothing. Missed you." Harry whispered, pulling Louis close. "Promise?" Louis asked. "No." "Then what's wrong?" "I'm depressed, Lou." Harry said. "Oh." Louis said, playful attitude dropping. "Make me smile, you're good at that." Harry said, pressing a kiss to Louis' forehead. "I don't know how." Louis whispered. "Do you want to take a shower with me? I feel dirty, haven't showered since yesterday morning." Harry said. 

"Yeah, can I smoke a cigarette first?" Louis asked. "Yeah, go head, I'll start the water." Harry said, pushing the blanket off of them. "Hey." Louis said, as Harry got up and walked towards the bathroom. Harry turned around, watching as Louis walked towards him. "I love you." Louis said, grabbing Harry's hands. "I love you more." Harry said, wrapping his arms around Louis. Louis pushed himself up on his tip toes, trying to reach Harry's lips, but Harry turned his head away. Louis frowned, falling back down to his normal height. "Haz." Louis whined. "Go smoke, babe." Harry said, letting go of Louis. Louis stood there frowning while Harry went into the restroom. He didn't want to smoke anymore, he was kind of upset, because why didn't Harry want to kiss him? "Harry?" Louis asked, walking into the restroom, where Harry was looking through his medicine cabinet. "What?" Harry asked, pulling out a pill bottle. "What's wrong?" Louis asked. "Nothing."

"I don't believe you." Louis said as Harry swallowed the pill without any water. "Just... Louis, why don't you go back home?" Harry sighed, closing the cabinet and going to turn the shower on. "B-but..." "Louis." Harry snapped. "O-okay. I'll go." Louis whispered, turning around. He grabbed his shoes and phone and left before he said something stupid. He didn't realize he was crying until he was about halfway home. His phone was buzzing in his pocket, but he didn't check to see who it was or what they wanted, he just kept walking home. He didn't know what he did wrong, why Harry suddenly didn't want to kiss him, suddenly wanted him to go home.

\--

Harry hadn't called, texted, or gone over to Louis' apartment for four days after that. Louis was confused, he was sad. He knew Harry wasn't dead or anything, Louis sent him a text, Harry read it, but didn't respond. As far as he knew, they were still together, but Louis was too scared to go to Harry's house. Gemma was at Louis' house, and Louis was struggling to not say anything about Harry. "Have you talked to Harry?" He finally asked, he couldn't hold it in anymore. "Yesterday, yeah. Why? Did you two... Split?" Gemma asked. "No... I don't know, he- I was over at his house because he asked me to come over and we were gonna shower but then he wouldn't kiss me and he asked me to leave, so... So I did, I left, and I texted him and he read it but didn't answer and I- I don't know what I did." Louis said. "When did that happen?" Gemma asked. "Sunday evening. And he was off of work on Monday and Tuesday, I don't know what's been going on, I just... I'm so scared that I said or did something wrong and that he doesn't love me anymore, I-" "Louis, go over there." She said. "But-" "Just go." Gemma said. "I'll drive you, come on, boy." She said, getting up.   
-  
"I'll see you later. Call me if you need anything." Gemma said as Louis got out of the car. Louis took in a deep breath, going to open the door with the key Harry gave him. It was empty. The apartment. It was completely empty and Louis' heart was racing. He went into Harry's bedroom, where there was a shoe box with Louis' name written in sharpie. He quickly went to open the box. He sat down, pulling the note out. 

Hey, baby!  
Believe it or not, this whole avoiding you thing was extremely difficult and I'm kind of heart broken about it. But let's not worry about that, we'll be together soon. I hope you're not too mad at me, but if you are, then I deserve it. I miss you so much, and I need you to come to the address below as soon as possible. It's only 10 or so minutes by car, so I left two twenties so you can call a cab, like I said, come as soon as possible. You'll hate me as soon as you walk in, but you love me, so get your beautiful arse over here. I love you 

~Harry Xx

Louis pulled the cash out of the box, then a key that was also there. He pulled out his phone, calling the nearest cab service. It only took five minutes for the driver to be there, he gave him the address and closed his eyes until they were there. He gave him the $40, telling him to keep the change and he rushed to the house that said sold in big, red letters, and he was already kind of pissed, but he didn't care, Harry was most likely waiting for him inside. He got the key that had been in the house, opening the door and walking inside, looking around. Harry's belongings and other new ones were in the house, and Louis couldn't believe this freaking man. He was quick to find the master bedroom, frantic to find his boyfriend. "What are you looking for?" 

Louis spun around, seeing Harry. "You're such a prick, God dammit." Louis said, pretty much sprinting to jump on him. Harry laughed, holding him up as Louis hugged him tight. "Thought you didn't love me anymore." Louis whimpered into his neck. "I love you so much, silly. Always." Harry said. "I missed you so much, I- you can't just do that to me, Harry." Louis said. "Are you mad at me for getting the house?" Harry asked. Louis pulled away from Harry's neck, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. "I'm pissed." Louis said, kissing him again. "It's our house, you know. It belongs to Harry and Louis Styles. At least that's what I wrote." Harry chuckled. "You stupid fucking idiot." Louis said, kissing his nose. "It's kind of hard to be mad at you when I haven't seen you in forever." 

"Come look in the backyard." Harry said, putting Louis down. "What's in the backyard?" Louis asked as Harry walked down the hall. "Come look." Harry said, rolling his eyes. Louis followed him, unsure of what was going to happen when he got there. "I don't know what you want to name him, so I didn't name him." Harry said, opening the back door and stepping out. "Oh my god." Louis gasped, looking at this beautiful fucking puppy, he'd never seen one like it, his fur was light gray with patches of brown and white, he had beautiful blue eyes, and floppy ears, he was so in love. "And there's also a pig pen. You know, if you decide you want a pig, cause I want a pig." Harry said as Louis sat down, the puppy jumping into his lap. Harry sat down next to him, gently putting his arm around his waist. "Pretty, isn't he? What is he called?" Harry asked, resting his chin on Louis' shoulder. "Scratch." Louis sniffed. "Baby, why are you crying?" Harry chuckled. "I love you." Louis said, looking at Harry. "I love you, too." Harry said, leaning in to quickly kiss him. 

"So I'd like to go gather your belongings, bring them here, and I already told your landlord that you'll be out by Sunday and paid to break your contract. Then we'll go shopping." Harry said, smiling. "No." Louis said, rubbing his new puppy's ears. "Then what do you want to do?" Harry asked. "I've been horny for the past two weeks, I want you to fuck me in our new bedroom." Louis said like it was nothing. "Okay, what's with the potty mouth, Tomlinson? I miss my innocent little boy." Harry said, leaning in to press a kiss to his neck. Louis snorted, nudging Harry away. "Innocent." Louis muttered, not taking his eyes off of Scratch. "You were. It took me forever to fuck the word 'God' out of you." Harry said. "I was an idiot. I can't believe I wasted so much time at church, I could've been out finding you." Louis said. "I miss it. I miss how proper and sinless you were. You wouldn't even say heck. It was cute." 

"You liked me like that?" Louis asked. "I loved you like that. I mean I love you all of the ways, but. That's what started it." Harry said. "So me now. How I am now. That's not what you originally signed up for?" Louis asked. "Louis, I was in love with you then, I'm in love with you now, I'll be in love with you in ten years from now. I don't care that you're a little bit different than you were when we first met. You're still you, and I love you." "I kind of suck, though. I don't have any family. Gemma's my only friend. I mean, I guess you could be counted as a friend, but you know what I mean. When you left me, you made a point that changed me. We're alone in this universe. All alone. Once I die, that's it for me. I'm gone." Louis said, watching as his puppy started sprinting around their new back yard. "Louis. We aren't alone. We didn't come from a Big Bang or evolution, but God is real, I know I said he wasn't, but I didn't want you to blame me, I wanted you to blame God. I don't know, I- I'm so sorry, I- I hate to think about that night." Harry said. Louis didn't say anything, playing with his fingers. 

Louis broke the silence. "I devoted my life to religion. My life is and was a mess. It's always been a mess. If I'm supposed to trust in God, why is he making life so difficult for me? Why do some of the most terrible people have everything they need and want? I'm not a bad person. Why do bad things happen to me?" "We'll be okay, Louis. You'll be okay. It's going to be good. Our lives, I mean. Things are going to get easy and we're going to be fine." Harry whispered to him. Louis stood up, escaping Harry's gentle touch, going to get Scratch. "Let's go inside." Louis said quietly, walking passed Harry. Harry stood up, following him in. "Do you want to see the rest of the house? There's a basement." Harry said. "Not now." Louis said quietly. "Louis? C'mere, baby." Harry said. Louis turned around, eyes trained on Patch, who was licking his hand. "Look at me, baby." Harry said, stepping closer. Louis set the puppy down by his feet, straightening his shirt before looking up at him. Harry gently placed his hands on Louis' hips as Louis crossed his arms. "You're my beautiful boy." Harry whispered, pressing their foreheads together. 

"Harry." Louis said. Harry pulled away, raising his eyebrows. Louis fell forward, head landing on Harry chest. "What's wrong, princess?" Harry asked, wrapping his arms around Louis, keeping him in place. "I don't know, I- I just... I don't know." Louis said. "Do you need anything? Like... Can I help, I-" "I missed you so much." Louis sniffed. "Oh baby, don't cry, I- I'm sorry, I love you so so much, I'll never do that again, okay?" Harry said. "You're all I have." Louis sobbed quietly, putting his arms around Harry. "I'm here, baby. I'm here, no one is going to take me away, I'm right here." Harry whispered, holding him close. They stayed like that for a while. Louis legs were sore from standing, but he didn't care. They didn't let go until Scratch started whimpering, biting at Harry's sock. "What if we break up? Or w-what if you get tired of me being around all the time? What will I do then?" Louis asked. "Louis. Baby. Don't ask ridiculous questions." Harry said, kissing his head. "But Harry, it's possible. We could break up, just... I'm just scared that I won't be able to get my apartment back if the time comes." Louis said. "Don't worry about that, okay? If we break up, I'll help you get your apartment back, assuming you don't cheat on me. Just don't cheat on me." "Of course not." Louis said, cringing at the thought. 

"Do you want to sleep? You look tired." Harry said, pulling away to cup Louis' cheeks. "I don't care. Just want to be with you. I missed you so much." Louis said. "I missed you, too, baby, it's okay, I'm here now." Harry said. "Should.. Should I get a job? Like, a proper job, I- I only have maybe ten thousand left in my bank account, that isn't enough but for two or three months, I-" "Louis, I make five thousand dollars a month, plus another thousand at the end of the month from... From government money I get, I- shit." Harry said, realizing he shouldn't have mentioned the extra thousand. "Government money? From what?" Louis asked, furrowing his eyebrows. "Like... Disability money. The government pays you twelve thousand dollars a year if you're disabled, and technically, I'm disabled." Harry said. "Oh." Louis said. "Can we... Can we talk about that another time? I'm okay, I promise." Harry said. "Okay." Louis agreed. 

\--

"You're not throwing away my bed, that bed is the most comfortable bed in the world." Louis said, crossing his arms. "But we have a brand new bed. It's comfortable now, and once we break it in, it'll be hard to leave it." Harry suggested. "Can we put my bed in the basement? That way we have another extra bed for when your family visits." Louis said. "Fine, but not in the main room, just in the little room. We're going to make the coolest basement ever, okay? So we can throw wild parties and have fun in there." Harry said. "We are not throwing any parties." Louis snapped. "Yes my princess, no parties." Harry said. "If we ever get married, you're going to invite all of your family and friends, and I'm just going to mail you a card. Don't you think people will wonder what why?" Louis asked. "We'll worry about that when the time comes." Harry said, kissing his cheek. "Don't worry your pretty little head, okay?" "Okay." 

\--  

"Liam, what.. What are you doing here?" Louis asked when he opened the door. "I-I... What are you doing here?" He asked. "I live here." Louis said. "I-I must be at the wrong house. Do you happen to know which of these houses Harry Styles live in? He gave me this address." Liam said, scratching his head. "Harry.. Harry lives here, h-he's my boyfriend." "Boyfriend? Harry Styles? Louis, you live with him? Do you know who he is? What the hell are you doing with a guy like Harry Styles?" Liam asked. "We've been together for a long time, I trust him enough. I didn't at first, but now I know him." Louis said. "Have you had sex with him?" Liam asked. "Liam." Louis scolded. "So you haven't. Listen, when you do, he's going to-" "We've had sex, Liam, stop. I love him, okay? We're happy, just. If it ends badly, then you can say I told you so, but right now, we're happy." Louis said. "Liam, hey, sorry, I didn't know you were coming yet." Harry's voice said as he came in, drying his hair with a towel. "Why didn't I know you guys were together?" Liam asked. "You didn't ask." Harry shrugged, pecking Louis on the lips as he approached them. "Come in, Liam, don't just stand there in shock." Harry said. 

\--

"Hey." Harry said, tossing his keys onto the coffee table, plopping down on the couch. Louis climbed up onto Harry's lap, straddling him. "Rough day?" Louis asked, reaching up to loosen Harry's tie. "Tired." Harry said. "You work so hard, baby. Let me reward you." Louis said, leaning into press a small kiss to his nose. "Reward me?" Harry asked. "If you want." Louis said, pecking his lips. "How?" Harry asked. Louis shrugged, leaning into gently kiss him, not just a peck but a kiss, one that filled Louis with butterflies and that made all of his tension suddenly disappear. A proper kiss, one that could be Harry's dying wish, but Louis had other plans, pushing his tongue into Harry's mouth. Harry thought it was nice, letting someone else be dominant, he didn't get off often anymore, the only time within the last ten months was the one time they had sex together. The tongue in his mouth was foreign, it was nice, it felt good. "Even fingered myself while you were gone so you wouldn't have to prep me." Louis breathed as he pulled away, moving to kiss Harry's neck. 

Suddenly, Harry could picture it, his little Louis on their bed, two- no three, fingers deep in his beautiful arse, moaning and crying, coming all over himself, and blood was rushing to Harry's cock faster than it ever had. Louis ground down on him all while biting his neck, leaving a not so small bruise. Harry let out a groan, placing his hand on Louis' hips. "God, Louis, you're so..." "So what?" Louis mumbled, unbuttoning Harry's shirt. "Beautiful. You're so beautiful, fuck." Harry breathed, pushing his hands under Louis' shirt, rubbing his sides. Louis pulled Away from his neck, kissing him as he continued to grind down onto Harry's cock. "B-bedroom, let's go to the- Lou." Harry breathed. "No." Louis said, pulling his own shirt off and throwing it aside. "Get your pants off." Louis said, standing up to take his own pajama pants off. Harry was quick to take his off and suddenly Louis was pushing him back onto the couch, reaching behind the couch cushion to pull a bottle of lube out. "Cheeky bastard. You planned this exact moment." Harry said. Louis pulled Harry's underwear off, nodding at Harry's comment. "Gonna ride you." Louis said, opening the bottle of lube and drizzling some on Harry's dick. Then tubing some against his hole. He climbed back onto Harry's lap, reaching  for Harry's dick, gently and slowly sitting on it, head hanging. "Fuck." Louis breathed, falling forward on Harry's chest. "Give me a second." Louis said, gently grinding down to get used to the fullness.

Harry gently placed his hands on Louis' hips, gently rubbing them to comfort him. He loved this feeling, just being inside of Louis' buried deep and good and Louis felt so good around him, so tight, so warm. "I love you." Harry whispered, kissing the top of Louis' head. Louis responded by slowly lifting off of Harry, only to slam back down, moaning loud at the feeling. "Fuck, baby." Harry groaned. Louis was already breathing hard, so so full, this was a new angle and Harry was pressing into Louis' prostate and Louis didn't know if he could take it, but he did it anyway for Harry, he began to bounce, creating a steady, quick rhythm, bouncing up and down on Harry's cock, Harry's hands guiding him. Louis moaned as he bounced, he felt so so good, even when his legs started to ache. He let out a cry as Harry bucked his hips up into him, beginning to fuck up into him. Louis moaned, falling forward on Harry's chest as Harry began to fuck him, hard and fast and Louis almost couldn't take it. "Oh, oh, Haz, d-don't stop, please don't stop, I-I need, I- oh." Louis whined. Harry flipped him over, beginning to fuck into him quickly. Louis let out little 'uh, uh, uh's every time Harry fucked into him, reaching down to quickly stroke his cock, gasping in pleasure. "H-Harry, I-I'm gonna... I..." Louis moaned. 

"Why so soon, princess? Gonna have to cum again if you cum now." Harry said into his ear. "Fuck, okay, I-" Louis gasped, squeezing his eyes shut. "Oh, Harry." Louis gasped, painting himself in white. "Gonna keep going, okay? Tell me if you need me to stop. The color is orange, remember?" Harry grunted, still fucking into Louis. Louis nodded, biting his tongue and moving his hand to grip Harry's bicep. "I love you." Louis whispered, head falling back onto the couch. "I love you, too, princess." Harry whispered, leaning down to kiss him, slowing his thrusts. He pushed into him slowly, but hard. Louis was breathing hard, not even kissing back, he felt so overwhelmed. Harry moved to kiss his neck, leaving dark marks, claiming him. "You're so beautiful." Harry whispered, pushing into him hard. "What's your color, baby?" Louis didn't answer, eyes shut. "Tell me- tell me your color." Harry snapped, stilling his hips against Louis' arse. "Haz, go." Louis whined. "Tell me the color." Harry repeated. "Orange, just fuck me!" Louis shouted, opening his eyes. Harry nodded, quickly beginning to fuck into him, holding Louis' hips. 

Louis was whining and crying, letting out whimpers and moans, he was hard again. When Harry went to take Louis' cock in his hand, Louis whined, pushing his hand away, he was too sensitive for that. Harry fucked him hard and fast, hitting his prostate with each thrust. He moved one hand to flick his thumb over Louis. "Almost there, okay, baby? Gonna fill you up." Harry grunted, pounding into him. Louis whined when Harry's steady thrusts turned to sloppy ones, hips stuttering one last time before spilling his seed into Louis. "Fuck, baby." Harry whispered, staying still, hovering above Louis. Louis whimpered as Harry pulled out, still hard, but now empty. "Want me to eat you out, baby?" Harry asked. Louis shook his head, he liked the feeling of Harry's cum inside him. "We need to clean you up. I'll suck you off then we'll take a shower, yeah?" Harry asked. "Don't want to clean." Louis whispered. "I'll be right back." Harry said. Louis whined, patiently waiting reaching down to finger himself as he waiting, swishing the cum around inside him. 

"Fuck, baby. Pull your fingers out, okay?" Harry said. Louis obeyed, bring his fingers to his mouth to suck what was left on his fingers. He gasped around his fingers as he felt something cold being pressed into him. "It's a plug, baby. It'll keep it inside." Harry explained, licking a stripe up Louis' cock. Louis moaned, removing his fingers from his mouth. Louis whimpered as Harry sucked the tip of his sensitive cock, pressing the plug into his prostate as he did so. He let out a cry when Harry slowly bobbed his head, creating a slow rhythm. He didn't know how much he could take, he was tired and was almost falling asleep, but couldn't because of the tension in his cock. He couldn't form any words to tell him to go faster, he started to feel floaty like he did the first time. He opened his mouth to moan, but didn't hear anything come out, so he just bucked his hips up into Louis' mouth so maybe he'd get the idea. He did. He began bobbing his head faster, taking all of his cock in his throat and Louis was jealous because he's obviously done this before.

Louis whimpered, feeling his orgasm coming, he knew it was coming, he needed it so bad. He couldn't warn Harry when he was cumming, so he just gasped and bucked his hips before cumming for the second time, but this time down Harry's throat. He whined as Harry pulled away, breathing hard. He was still floaty, he could hear a word Harry said, he couldn't think straight. "Baby? Baby, talk to me." Harry said, but Louis couldn't hear him. "Are you with me, princess? Come back to me." Harry nervously cleaned Louis off, leaving the plug inside. Harry noticed his breathing was steady again and his eyes were fluttering after a few minutes. "Haz." Louis mumbled and Harry's heart leaped. "Yes, princess?" Harry whispered. "You're not going to leave, right?" Louis whimpered, eyes still closed. "Of course not." Harry whispered, gently scooping Louis up to carry him into the bedroom. "You're going to stay?" Louis mumbled. "I do live here." Harry chuckled, gently laying him down on the bed. Louis didn't respond, burying his face in his pillow. Harry climbed into bed next to his lover, pulling him close. "I love you, Louis." Louis hummed in agreement, gently running his his fingers over Harry's skin. 

\--

"Our Father, Who art in heaven  
Hallowed be Thy Name;  
Thy kingdom come,  
Thy will be done,  
on earth as it is in heaven.  
Give us this day our daily bread,  
and forgive us our trespasses,  
as we forgive those who trespass against us;  
and lead us not into temptation,  
but deliver us from evil. Amen."

"Lou? What are you doing, princess?" Harry asked. Louis shushed him, gently thumbing the rosary in his hand. Harry grinned, sheepishly, looking at his beautiful boyfriend. "You're back to this, are you, princess?" Harry asked. "Harry, hush." Louis snapped, eyes still closed. "I'm sorry, baby. I'll be in the living room." Harry said, leaning down to gently kiss his cheek. Louis only nodded, staying in his position next to the bed and bowing his head. Harry went back to the living room, turning the Telly on and waiting for Louis to come out. It only took about five minutes for Louis to come in and sit down next to Harry. "Hey, beautiful boy." Harry said, scooting closer to Louis. "Haz, it's been a year." Louis said. "Since?" Harry asked, wrapping his arms around Louis. "Since the night you left me." "Baby, I don't like to talk about that." Harry whispered, dropping a kiss on his shoulder. "I know, but- but I've been having these... These dreams. Like about how you would leave me again if I didn't get right with God. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I've been so afraid." Louis said. 

"Let's go to Paris, or Rome, maybe." Harry said, looking up at him. "What?" Louis asked. "Paris or Rome. Yeah?" He asked. "Harry, were you... Were you even listening to me?" Louis asked. "Of course I was, baby. I'm not going to leave you, I'd never dream about it. I love you. Get right with God. I'm okay with that, I miss you scolding at me every time I say 'shit'." Harry said, smiling at him. "So you... You understand?" Louis asked. "Of course I do. So Rome or Paris?" Harry asked. "Neither, Harry, we don't have the money." Louis said. "Sure we do. I'll get Gemma to keep Scratch, and we'll leave next week. Paris or Rome?" "Haz, I really think we should stay here." "And I really think we should go. I already took work off for a month starting Monday, but on paid hours." "Harry, how-" "I'm about to buy the tickets. Paris or Rome?" Harry asked. "Harry." Louis snapped. "Louis. Paris or Rome? I'll choose if you don't choose in the next ten seconds." "Paris, Harry, but-" "Paris it is." "Harry!" Louis whined as Harry got up, walking towards their bedroom. 

\--

"I'm not getting on the plane with you." Louis muttered, crossing his arms as they waited in line. "Yes you are." Harry said. "I have a knife in my pocket so that they'll arrest me." Louis whispered. "No you don't." Harry grinned. "I love you." "I know." Harry whispered, pressing a kiss to the side of his head. "Please put every metal or possibly metal item on you in this crate, then step through the metal detector, sir." "Can I talk to you for a second?" Harry asked the officer. "I guess, make it quick, you've got people behind you." The officer said. Louis furrowed his eyebrows as Harry gently pulled the officer aside, talking to him for a moment, then handing him a fifty dollar bill before coming back. "What was that? You just gave him fifty dollars." Louis said, putting his things in the crate. "Don't worry about it." Harry said, gently patting Louis' bum. Louis glared at him, walking through the metal detector. 

\--

"Anne? Gemma? What's going on, Harry?" Louis asked, turning around. "Louis, this is Jay. All of these little children are too many to name right now, so I'll tell you after I explain them to you. Louis, are you aware that you were adopted as a baby?" Harry asked. Louis looked at him, furrowing his eyebrows. "What?" "You were adopted, Louis. You have a family, and this is them. This is your mother. These are your sisters." Harry said. "Harry, you- I don't want to talk to them, I- I know I was adopted, but she abandoned me, did you drag me here to meet my biological mother?" Louis asked, angrily. "Louis, no, listen to me. She didn't abandon you. She was fourteen, she was poor, she couldn't afford to keep you and she thought putting you up for adoption was the right thing to do. She was raped, Louis, she-" "I'm going back to the hotel." Louis whispered. "Lou-" "Louis, wait!" Gemma said, standing up. 

"You're my best friend and you're always here for me, and I'll always be there for you. Will you marry me?" Gemma asked. Louis blinked, looking at her in confusion before it hit him like a bullet. "Louis. I'm your mom, I- I know I put you up for adoption, and I'll always regret it. But without it, you wouldn't have met Harry. I love you. Will you marry me?" Jay said, stepping towards Louis. "I've known you for a while, Louis. You come over to visit me like I'm already part of your family. You help me out and we have fun even though you're 25 years younger than I am. Will you marry me?" Anne asked. Louis stayed silent, unsure of what to say. "I'm Daisy. This is Phoebe. We've always wanted a brother. Will you marry us?"

"Louis Tomlinson. You're the love of my life," Louis heard Harry begin to speak from behind him. His heart started beating fast and he couldn't breathe as he turned around. "You've made me into a new, better man," Harry said, kneeling down. "You're the most beautiful, amazing person I've met, that I'll ever meet. I know that I'm not the smartest man. I know that I make mistakes, that I've made some pretty big mistakes. I know that you haven't always liked my tattoos or my attitude, we're very different people, but I love you so much." Louis watched as Harry reached into his back pocket, pulling out a small box. "This was hell to get through the metal detectors, I had to tell the security guard that you were a woman who once had breast cancer because he didn't support gay marriage and pay him to smuggle this in without you seeing it. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Louis. Will you marry me?" Harry asked, smiling up at him. Louis didn't know what to do, he was speechless and his stomach hurt from all the butterflies. "So you dragged me here to propose." Louis said. It wasn't a question, it was a statement. 

"You know I would have said yes if you asked me in the bathroom stall of Taco Bell, right?" Louis giggled. Harry smiled, nodding. "You deserve the best." "You're so cliché." "You love me." Harry said. "So much." Louis sighed, falling down to Harry's height to hug him. "You haven't answered my question." Harry whispered, hugging him close. "I'm not going to marry you." Louis whispered so that only Harry could hear. Harry's whole face dropped into a grimace that no one could see because his face was buried in Louis' neck. "Harry, chill, I can feel you getting sad, of course I'll marry you." Louis chuckled. "Fuck, I love you so much." Harry breathed. They spent the rest of the night celebrating with their families, Louis uniting with his and falling in love with all of them instantly. 

\--

"I don't know if you'll really be into it, but I want you to try something for me. If you don't want to, it's okay." Harry whispered in his ear in the elevator. "Mm, what is it?" Louis mumbled. He was so drunk, he could barely keep his eyes open and Harry had to help him walk. "I'll show you when we get to our room, princess." Harry whispered, pressing a soft kiss beneath Louis' ear. It wasn't long until Harry was helping Louis stumble down the hallway, Harry wasn't drunk, he didn't have anything. "Got me- got me drunk to take ad-advantage of me." Louis giggled against his skin. "Of course not, baby." Harry said, unlocking their door, pulling Louis in. "Want you." Louis whined, instantly pulling his shirt off. "But first I want you to try something on for me." Harry said. "But we're just going to take it off." Louis giggled, moving to kiss Harry's neck. "Not if I can help it." Harry mumbled, getting pulling Louis off of him and walking to his suit case. "Wait, I- w-what's that?" Louis giggled, stumbling towards Harry. "Try them on for me." Harry said, catching him as he tripped over his own feet. Louis snatched them from Harry's hands, stumbling to the bathroom. 

"Be careful. Don't fall down." Harry called after him.  Louis nodded even though Harry couldn't see him, looking at the soft material in his hands. Louis took his clothes off, looking at the panties, confused. "I can't find the back." Louis shouted, giggling. "Just try until it looks right, baby." Harry called to him. It took Louis four tries to get them on correctly, he was so confused. His bum was completely exposed, a big hole where it looked like fabric was supposed to be there. They were definitely girl panties, they were pink and lacy with cute little bows and Louis already felt self conscious. He suddenly felt a little more sober, but at the same time, stupid. He shyly pushed the door open, walking in. "I feel stupid." Louis said, quietly. "Louis." Harry breathed, standing up. 

Louis shyly looked away, crossing his arms. "Wow, I- you're so... You're so beautiful, baby, you look so good, fuck." Harry whispered, walking towards him. "You're just saying that." Louis whispered, looking down. "No, baby, you're so beautiful, princess, fuck, C'mere." Harry said, pulling Louis to gently kiss him. "I don't think so." Louis mumbled, feeling like he was going to cry. "Don't say that. You're beautiful, th-the most beautiful." Harry said, gently pulling Louis towards the bed. Louis felt like Harry was saying this so they could have sex, he felt stupid for agreeing to this. He knew he was right when Harry gently pushed him onto the bed, leaning down to kiss him. It wasn't heated, it was innocent and tingly, but Harry pulled away to kiss his neck. "Most beautiful." Harry whispered into his skin. "I'm so lucky to have you. So grateful." 

Louis stayed silent, letting Harry kiss his skin, guiltily feeling his dick harden as Harry kissed his chest, leaving dark marks in his path. "All mine." He mumbled before flicking his tongue over Louis' nipple. Louis gasped as he felt the new sensation, it was something he wasn't used to and had never even thought about. "Cute little nipples. Looks like they're sensitive. Some people don't feel a thing." Harry chuckled into his skin and he moved to lick the other nipple. "Fuck, Haz, I-" Louis gasped, bucking his hips. Harry shushed him, continuing to kiss to his stomach. "Love your tummy. My favorite." Harry said, leaving a small bruise on his stomach. Louis hated it, he hated the fat on his stomach, he'd gone on a diet and stayed on it for six months because of the pudge on his stomach, but it wouldn't go away, he'd been running miles every single day while Harry was at work, but it was still there. He didn't understand how Harry could love it because it made Louis feel fat. Harry didn't know he'd been trying to get rid of it, sure he noticed how light Louis always ate, but he didn't think of it. 

Louis snapped out of his thoughts when Harry gently bit the pudgiest part, the part that Louis hated the most before kissing over it. "You hear me? I love it." Harry said before moving down to his thighs, completely skipping over his pantie-clad cock. "Haz." Louis whined, trying to buck his hips up. "You have the prettiest thighs. God your thighs are so- they're so sexy and I fucking love them so much." Harry said, biting his inner thigh. Louis let out a whine, quickly moving his hand to cover his mouth because who moans when they get bit? "Let it out, baby. Let out your pretty little moans, they make me so happy." Harry mumbled into his thigh, beginning to leave a dark mark there. "Haz, I- I need... I-" Louis whimpered. Harry shushed him, moving to kiss the other thigh. "So so pretty." Harry whispered, almost inaudible. "Haz, why won't you hurry up?" Louis whined. "Want you to know how beautiful you are." Harry said, moving up to press a quick kiss to his lips. "Look so pretty in your panties, baby. You gonna wear some like these for me all the time or do you not like them?" Harry asked, gently nudging his side so that he'd roll onto his stomach. Louis shrugged, shyly hiding his face in his arms. 

Harry ran his tongue up his back, dropping a small kiss to his shoulder. "It's okay if you don't like them. We can take them off whenever you want." Harry whispered, pressing a kiss beneath his ear. Louis moaned as Harry gently groped at his bum, whimpering when Harry brought his hand up only to slap it back down, only so it stung a little bit, but wasn't painful. Louis moaned, closing his eyes, grinding down onto the bed. "Don't." Harry growled, moving to smack his bum again. Louis whimpered, nodding his head in obedience. "You've got such a pretty bum. I'm gonna eat you out, baby. You want that?" Harry asked, kissing just above his bum. "Please." Louis whined, trying to keep his hips still but failing. "Gonna take care of you, baby. Gonna make you feel good." Harry whispered into his skin. "Oh, daddy." Louis whined as Harry flicked his tongue over Louis' clean, tight hole.

Harry quickly pulled away from his bum, looking at him, befuddled. "Daddy?" Harry asked. Louis hid his face in embarrassment, heart beating fast. "I-I'm sorry, I-i don't know what came over me, I-" Louis whimpered. "No, baby, it's okay. Fuck, i-it's really okay, c-can you call me that? Fuck, baby, it's okay." Harry said, moving back to his bum, pushing his tongue in. Louis gasped, gripping onto the sheets. "Haz, I-" Louis whined, pushing back on his tongue as Harry licked as far as he could into him. Louis was so out of it, he didn't even notice when Harry stopped to lube up his fingers until he was pushing the first one in. "More." Louis groaned, moving his hands to tug at his own hair. Harry quickly obliged, adding his another finger. "Tell me what you want, baby. Tell daddy what you want." Harry whispered in his ear, gently biting the soft spot he'd learn to know so well. "Oh, daddy, I need... I need your... I need you." Louis whined, gasping when Harry crooked his fingers. "Need me to what?" Harry asked, scissoring his fingers. "N-need you t-to fuck me, daddy, n-need your dick." 

Harry groaned, pulling his fingers out. Louis moaned, grinding on to the bed as Harry walked to his suitcase. Louis quickly reached back shoving his fingers in himself, whining when he could reach the spot he so desperately needed to be touched. He gasped as he curled his fingers, twisting and adding a third as soon as possible. Even with his own fingers, it was so so good, not the same as Harry's, but still good. "Louis, quit that." Harry growled, walking back to Louis. Louis didn't respond, eyes closed, moaning as he fingered himself and God, was Harry hard in his stupid jeans. Harry watched more a moment as Louis struggled to fit his pinky, stopping for a moment when he didn't because it wasn't something they'd ever done, but suddenly Harry wanted to do it.

Harry snapped Louis out of it with a slap to his bum, watching as Louis stilled his hand before gently and slowly pulling them out. Louis patiently waited, eyes closed as if he was asleep. Harry watched for a moment, just taking in this beautiful sight, cause his Louis, his baby, his princess, his everything was just waiting for harry, needing Harry. Harry gently pushed two fingers in, twisting, then gently pulling back out, drizzling lube onto three fingers. He quickly pushed them back in, expanding all three of his fingers to stretch Louis even more. "Haz please please get inside me, please I need, I- please, dad-oh-dy, need your cock." Louis whined, gasping as Harry twisted his fingers. "Gotta be patient, baby. Gonna fill you up as much as I can." Harry told him, drenching his pinky in lube to add it inside of Louis' tight hole. "Fuck, there, Haz, please." Louis whined, pushing back against his fingers as Harry brushed his prostate. Harry moved his fingers away from the small bump, knowing it would frustrate Louis, would make him cry and beg for it, beg for Harry. "Daddy." Louis whimpered, arching his back, gripping the sheets. Harry didn't answer, twisting his fingers inside of Louis. 

"More?" Harry asked so gently that Louis jumped. "More." Louis breathed. Harry got the lube, pouring a very generous amount on the rest of his hand, before pushing his thumb in, hand in a fist inside of Louis. Louis was breathing harsh, this was new, this was big. Harry's fist was in him. "Are you ready?" Harry asked. Louis didn't respond, eyes squeezed shut, he could barely even think. "Baby, tell daddy what you need." Harry whispered hotly in Louis' ear. "Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me, daddy, fuck me." Louis moaned, pushing back on his fist. Harry groaned, stretching out his hand inside of Louis. "Oh, daddy, I-" Louis gasped, arching his back. "Is it too much?" Harry asked. " 'S a lot." Louis whimpered, pushing back against his hand. "Never thought I'd have my entire hand in you." Harry groaned, moving to rub his prostate, making Louis cry out, eyes widening as his dick twitched. "Think you can come twice?" Harry asked, rubbing his prostate. Louis shook his head, gasping at the sensation. 

"You sure? It would be a shame." Harry pouted. "Please, please, please, daddy, fuck me, please, need it now, please." Louis begged, eyes filling with tears as he pushed back against Harry's fist. "Gonna fuck you. My fiancé. Gonna fuck my fiancé." Harry breathed into his ear, leaving a gentle kiss as he pulled out his hand, making him cry out. "Relax, baby. Give me just a second." Harry said, quickly shedding the remainder of his clothes off. "Haz." Louis whined, flipping back around so that he was on his back. "What, baby?" Harry asked. "I love you." Louis told him. "I love you, princess. I love you so so much." Harry said, walking to him and leaning down to kiss him. Louis reached around to gently tug Harry's curls, gasping as he felt Harry brush against his empty hole. They kept kissing, even when Harry slowly pushed into him. Louis wasn't kissing back a lot but Harry didn't care, he kept kissing Louis like he was going to die the next day. 

"Fuck, I love you, baby." Harry breathed into the kiss. Louis moaned in response, pushing back against Harry's cock, so ready to cum. "C'mon, Haz." Louis whined, still pulling Harry by his hair to keep kissing him. "Gonna fuck you nice and slow, princess." Harry whispered, gently pulling out before pushing back in, painfully slow. "Harry." Louis snapped, pushing back. "You want to ride me, baby? You look so pretty in your panties, show daddy what you can do." Harry said, finally pulling away from their kiss. Louis gasped as Harry grabbed onto his hips, flipping them around so Louis was on top of him. "Ride me, baby." Harry whispered. Louis placed his hands on Harry's chest, bracing himself, because even with Harry's fist just in him, Louis felt like he was being split open on Harry's dick. Louis gently ground down, letting out a whimper. He closed his eyes, letting out quiet but precious little noises that made Harry's stomach fill with butterflies. Harry didn't expect it when Louis started to bounce on his cock, slamming his hips up and down, eyes squeezed shut, letting out a loud 'uh' every time he went back down. "Shhh, princess. People are going to complain." Harry said, gripping on to Louis' hips. Louis didn't listen, continuing to moan loudly, letting his daddy know how good he felt. 

  "Need you to fuck me, daddy, need you to make me hurt in the morning please, daddy, need it, c'mon, give it to me, I can take it." Louis whined, grinding down on Harry's cock. Harry groaned, beginning to fuck up into him, as Louis threw his head back, the only sound that could be heard was the constant slapping of skin because Harry literally knocked the breath out of Louis. After quite a few seconds, he finally gasped in a breath of air, moaning out as Harry hit his prostate harder and faster than he had ever done before. "Look so pretty in these panties, baby. So beautiful for daddy." Harry groaned, fucking up into him. Louis moaned, sweat running down his temple, falling against Harry. "Love it when you take my cock like this, baby. Wish we could do this all the time, baby." Harry whispered to him. "Need you to stay with me tonight, okay? Don't slip out, I need you to remember this, all of this." Harry said, flipping them over to hold him down while he fucked him into the mattress. "Okay." Louis whined, reaching down to touch his throbbing dick. "Let me." Harry growled, knocking Louis' hand away, replacing it with his. "Fuck, you're so pretty, baby." Harry said, tugging on his dick. "Haz. 'M close, I-" "Don't you-uh- dare." Harry said, letting go. "Please, daddy, please, I-I... Please let me cum, I-I'll suck you afterwards, daddy, let you- oh, let you cum in my mouth, fuck, please." Louis sobbed. 

"Fuck, okay." Harry said, starting to jerk him off again, watching in awe as Louis came with a cry, Harry just fucked him through it. "I love you." Harry sighed, gently pulling out of him. "I love you, too." Louis gasped, moving to the edge of the bed so he could get to Harry's leaking cock. "Fuck you're so pretty, baby." Harry said as Louis leaned in to lick at the tip, looking up at him through his lashes. "Don't tease daddy. I let you cum early, you better get that cock down your throat." Harry growled, grabbing a fist of Louis' hair, making Louis moan. Louis took Harry's cock into his mouth, concentrating on taking it down as much as he could, tongue running along the bottom. He bobbed his head slowly, he didn't do too well with deep and fast at the same time. Harry gently ran his hands through Louis' hair, biting his lip because Louis looked so good like this. "Baby?" Harry asked. Louis pulled away for a moment, looking up at him. "Can I fuck your mouth? Just tap my thigh if it's too much, but can I please?" Harry asked. 

Louis only nodded, opening his mouth for Harry. He was kind of nervous, but he didn't want to disappoint Harry. So when Harry pushed in fast, and so deep, Louis had to keep himself from choking on it, he shut his eyes and breathed through his nose. "Fuck, baby. So good for me. Good for Daddy." Harry praised, fucking into his mouth. Tears were running down Louis' face, cheeks tinted pink and he looked so wrecked, Harry almost couldn't take it. "You're so- fuck- pretty." Harry breathed. "Love how you just take my cock." Louis tried relaxing his throat, but it didn't work very well, he coughed around his cock, gagging on it. "Fuck, I'm sorry, baby." Harry said, pulling out quickly. "Just suck, yeah? Almost there." Harry said. Louis nodded, placing his hand around the base, beginning to bob his head quickly, using his hand to jerk off what he didn't take. "Fuck, baby, just a little more." Harry groaned, throwing his head back. Louis took as much as he could, sucking hard around him. Harry moaned as he came down Louis' throat, knees buckling. "Fuck, baby, so good." Harry moaned. 

Louis took it all, moaning around Harry's dick. He whimpered when Harry pulled away from him, looking up at him. "Swallow it, baby." Harry said, gently brushing Louis' fringe with his fingers. Louis did as he said, swallowing Harry's cum, he felt so dirty. Harry quietly leaned down a pressed a quick kiss to his lips before walking to the to the bathroom. "Haz, please hurry." Louis called out when he heard the shower turn on. Harry poked his head out, waving him to come with him and Louis obeyed, feeling weird with his cum filled panties still on. "Let's get these off, princess." Harry said, snapping the elastic of Louis' panties against his skin. Louis began to take them off, by Harry slapped his hands away, picking him up and placing him on the counter. Harry leaned in to kiss his neck as he pulled Louis' panties off of him. "Shower's gonna get cold." Louis mumbled as Harry kissed his neck. "C'mon, princess." Harry said, pulling him off of the counter. 

They got in silently, sharing the hot water pouring down on them. Harry didn't say anything, just helped Louis wash and sometimes pressed little kisses to his mouth. Louis was just thinking. Thinking about how Harry was his first everything. First boyfriend. First kiss, first date, first love. First heart break. First blow job, first man to sleep in the same bed as him, first bad influence, first time. First fiancé. Hopefully only fiancé. But... But wait. He wasn't Harry's first anything. Well, besides fiancé, but all the other things. "How many people have you been with?" Louis asked quietly. "Louis." Harry whispered, looking away from him. "Please tell me." Louis said. "Like... Like what do you mean? How many have I dated or how many have I slept with?" Harry asked. "Both." Louis said, looking away. "I had a boyfriend in freshman year for seven months or so. He took my virginity then broke up with me. Then I never really dated. I mean, like I would take a boy on a date, but not necessarily because I wanted to be with them. I wanted sex." Harry explained, reaching for the body wash. "Then I met you and I knew it was different the minute I realized we were going on a second date. That was my first second date ever. Like my first boyfriend and I never went on dates, we just kind of made out when our parents weren't around. Usually, I'd have the other guy on his knees within 10 minutes of the first date, but you... We didn't even kiss until the fourteenth date. I was so broken when I left you. I regretted it so much, I only did it because I was in love with you and I was afraid you would leave me." "Harry." Louis said. 

"What?" Harry asked. "You didn't answer my question." Louis sighed, opening the shower curtain and stepping out. He grabbed a towel, quickly drying himself as quick as he could. "Do you really want to know?" Harry asked, turning off the shower. "Yes, I really want to know." Louis said. "Why? It doesn't matter anymore, I've changed, you're the only one I'll ever be with again. Can't you just live with knowing just that?" Harry asked. "Harry, I want to know." Louis said, looking at him. "But why?" "Because, Harry, I've slept with you. Only you. I know that you've been with other men, but you've been my first everything. You're going to be my only everything, why can't you just tell me how many people you've slept with? I know that nothing will make me the best you've ever had, because obviously it's quite a few if you won't even tell me. We're going to get married, Harry, I want to know as much as I can about you, and I need you to trust that I'm not going to automatically freak out." Louis said. "Okay, one, you are most certainly the best I've ever had. And two, fine. I'll tell you. I promise you, I'm being completely honest when I say this. I don't know." Harry said.

"You what?" Louis asked. "I don't know how many people I've slept with." Harry said. "So like over 20, over 30..." "Way over 30. I lost count a long time ago." Harry said. Louis looked away, shaking his head. "You're 20." Louis said, wrapping his towel around him. "You said you wouldn't freak out." Harry said. "Because I thought it would be like 10 people! Are you really that much of an asshole, Harry? You just use people so that... so that you can feel could?" Louis asked. "Louis, I'm not going to fight you. I haven't slept with one person besides you since the moment I met you. I'm fucked up in the head, Louis. What I did then is in the past, it's something that I don't like to think about, you can't be mad at me for what I used to do! I never had unprotected sex, it's not like I could give you AIDS." Harry said. "Fuck, I didn't even think about that! I let you cum inside me without even thinking about how many people your dick has been in. Oh my god." Louis said, eyes widening.

Harry feelings were suddenly really hurt, Louis was standing in front of him, judging him, judging everything he had ever done, everything he had ever been. He grabbed a towel, walking passed Louis. "Tonight was supposed to be great, Louis. That's why I didn't want to tell you how many people I've slept with. I knew this would happen, I- you know that I've changed, Lou. If you don't believe me, if you're going to sit here and pretty much tell me I'm an asshole whore who uses people, then maybe we shouldn't be getting married." Harry said, tears starting to fall from his eyes  "Fuck, I- I'm sorry, I- I shouldn't have asked I was just... I was surprised, you know how much I love you, don't say that, don't that we shouldn't get married." Louis breathed, quickly following Harry to comfort him. "I need some air." Harry said, shaking his head, quickly beginning to get dressed. Louis could do nothing but watch, heart beating fast. Harry grabbed his room key and wallet, stuffing them in his pocket before heading to the door. "Please don't leave me alone." Louis said quietly as Harry reached for the door knob. Harry paused for a second, hesitating, before opening the door and walking out. 

Louis' heart sort of broke, he knew it was mostly his fault, but he was so upset, he didn't want Harry to leave him. All that was heard in the room was Louis shuffles and sniffles as he got one of Harry's sweaters and a pair of underwear to put on and climbed in bed, waiting for Harry to come back. The room was cold, but he didn't want to put the blanket on, he just wanted Harry to come back and hold him, but he knew he'd be asleep by the time Harry got back. 

-  
Harry walked across the street to the little bakery he saw earlier, ordering a pastry, but he was too upset to actually eat it. He knew his eyes were probably red and so were his cheeks, the cashier offered him a free drink, but he politely declined. After a good hour of sitting in the bakery, picking at his pastry and scrolling through Twitter, he decided to roam around for a little while, he wasn't ready to talk about it to Louis yet. He walked up the street, letting his feet carry him around the unfamiliar city, but after a while, he was lost, extremely lost. He sat down on a bench, putting his head in his hands. All he could think about was how much of a whore he was. Stupid fucking asshole. Harry shook his head, trying to clear the thoughts. 

"Excusez-moi monsieur? Est ce que tu vas bien?" A small voice asked. "Um... I-  ne parle français." Harry said, lifting his head up to look at who the small voice came from. It was a boy, not too old, but not too small. "Then why did you come to Paris?" He asked, taking a seat next to him. "To propose." Harry said, looking away from him. "Oh... Did... Did she say no?" He asked. "Well. He said yes. But we got in a fight." Harry told him. " 'Ow long ago?" "Few hours. I left so I could get some air. He's probably asleep now." Harry sighed. "Shouldn't 'ou go talk to 'im? 'Ou love him, no? Don't let anything ruin your relationship, go see 'im." The boy spoke, softly. "I don't know how to get back to the hotel." Harry sighed. "Which one?" He asked. 

\--

Soon, Harry had found his way back to the hotel after getting directions from the boy whose name he didn't know. He was quick to get back to their room, seeing Louis asleep on their bed. "I Louis, wake up, baby." Harry asked, turning on the light. Louis quickly shot up, standing as soon as he realized Harry was back. "I'm so sorry, I'm sorry, please don't be angry, I love you so much, I don't care how many people you've been with, I don't care, I'm so in love with you, Harry, you're all that matters, as long as we're together, I don't care about anything else." Louis said, quickly hugging him, burying his face in Harry's chest. "No, baby, I'm sorry for leaving, I'm sorry that I was like that, I'm sorry that I hurt all those people, I'm sorry that I hurt you. I promise, I will never ever be that person again, I want to marry you and spend my life with you and start a family with you in our home, I want to go to church with you every Sunday, I want to have family and friend gatherings someday where our children and nephews or Nieces can play together, I want to be a happy family that has the best Christmases, I want to take you on romantic dates regularly, I want to make you feel like you're the most important, beautiful boy on this earth, because you are and I love you so much." Harry said, holding him close. 

\--

Louis was 21. Harry was 23. They weren't married yet, Louis had gotten a part time job and was doing an online college, they put Louis' whole paycheck towards wedding funds (plus 10% of Harry's paycheck in a savings account) every month. Life was easy, it was simple and Louis and Harry were still so in love. Sex used to be a rare thing in their relationship, they'd only had sex three or four times in the first year they were together. But when Louis turned 19, he was almost always all over Harry, he loved just touching Harry. He would climb into Harry's lap and tell him stories, some that he'd told a million times before, but Harry would just listen, would press kisses to his hands as he spoke. It usually ended in making out with Louis in his lap, then Harry would fuck him on the couch or against the wall, or would bend him over the dining room table or kitchen counter. Sometimes it was rough and dirty, other times it was gentle and sweet, Harry would make love to him and whisper sweet words into his skin. After they finished, they would lay in bed and face each other and talk, talk about anything and everything, they never ran out of conversation. Other nights, Louis would fall asleep on Harry's chest as Harry sang to him, and Harry would fall asleep soon after. They didn't fight often, they argued over some things, opinions and such, but they never really got mad at each other. 

\--

Harry had taken the day off, he was still asleep when Louis woke up. Louis decided to run to the store to get some food for the day and some wine for later, plus Scratch needed some dog food because Louis insisted that Scratch only eat canned wet dog food, so they ran out of that pretty quickly. Louis quickly grabbed Harry's coat and his keys and slipped into his slippers, letting Scratch outside before quickly going to the car. Louis decided on making fajitas that night, getting some chicken and shrimp for it. He got avocados, peppers, chips, wine, and some ice cream for after. On his way to check out, he gasped as he bumped into someone, immediately apologizing. He stopped in his mid-sorry as he looked up at the person. "Louis?" "I-I.. Hi, I- um..." "How... How are you?" He asked. "I'm fine. I'm great actually, I-" Louis breathed. "That's good. Are you still... You know... With that boy?" He asked. "Engaged, actually." Louis said, lifting up his hand to show the ring. "That's um... That's good. Do you maybe want to come over for dinner one day? I've met a woman, she's kind of actually been bugging me to call you lately. You can... Um... Bring him if you want, I-" "I don't know if I really want to." Louis said. "Well you... You are my son. I'm sorry, alright? I shouldn't have freaked out like that, it was ridiculous and I love you for who you are. Please consider it. This Sunday, yeah? Come at 6 PM. If you want." He said. "I'll think about it." Louis told him. 

\--

"I ran into my dad today." Louis said. "What'd he say?" Harry asked, looking up at him. "He invited us to dinner." Louis said quietly. "Oh." Is all Harry said. Louis nodded, getting up and going to the living room. He laid on the couch for a while, watching reruns of how I met your mother, waiting for Harry to hopefully join him, but he lost hope after an hour or so. He suddenly felt really sad, he really wanted Harry to hold him, but instead he whistled for Scratch who climbed right up on to the couch and squeezed between Louis and the couch. Louis smiled, petting him. "Good boy." He sighed, rub his ear between his fingers. "Babe!" Harry called. Louis didn't respond, continuing to pet his dog. "Lou?" Harry asked after a minute, walking into the living room. "Baby? What's wrong? Why are you crying?" Harry asked, quickly kneeling down next to him, brushing the hair from his face. "I don't know." Louis whispered. "Oh, baby, don't cry, it's okay. I'm right here, I'm here, don't cry." Harry breathed, leaning in to gently kiss him. "I'm okay, I'm just- I don't know. Honestly, I don't know." Louis said. "Do you want to go out? Let's go somewhere, let's do something fun." "No, it's okay, honest. Just want some wine and a cuddle." Louis told him, sitting up. 

"White or red?" Harry asked, standing. "Red please. Bring the whole bottle, gonna drink my arse off." Louis said, leaning back into the couch. "You spill when you get drunk. Still want red?" Harry asked. "Go head and bring white." Louis said. Harry nodded, quickly moving to grab two wine glasses and the bottle of wine. He brought them back, pouring them each a glass, giving Louis a lot more than him. "Thank you, darling." Louis said, picking up the glass. "Of course, princess." Harry said, quickly pressing a kiss to his lips. He sat down, turning off the TV and looking at Louis. Louis hummed in question as he sipped on his wine. "You're beautiful." Harry said, smiling sheepishly. "I think I'm always going to be completely smitten when it comes to you." He said, gently caressing his thigh. "I love you." Louis sighed. "I love you." Harry responded. 

Louis drank and drank, the bottle was empty before Harry could ever finish his first glass. "You know what's funny?" Louis giggled, scooting closer. "What's funny, princess?" Harry said. "We've been engaged for years. We're never really getting married, are we?" Louis asked. "Of course we are, baby. We're gonna have a big, beautiful wedding. It'll be all about you." Harry said, pressing a kiss to his hand. "I get scared that you'll leave me. That you'll just keeping pushing the wedding back so that we don't ever get married." Louis said. "Baby, I-" Harry started, putting his wine glass down. "I would never leave you. Not after last time. I was so depressed, I got off of my medication, I was a disaster without you. I'll always be in crazy love with you, I don't know what it is about you besides perfection. I love you so much, I- I just want you to be able to have the most amazing wedding possible, and money usually isn't an issue for us, but we don't have it in our budget to just randomly spend tens of thousands of dollars on the wedding, but I promise you, it'll be worth the wait. It will be the best day of my life." Harry sighed.

  "I need more wine." Louis announced, pushing himself up, almost stumbling. "Let me help you, pretty boy." Harry said, following him to the kitchen, gently gripping his hips every time he would stumble to keep him from falling. "I need a massage." Louis groaned drunkenly, as he stood on his tip toes to get another bottle of wine. "I'll give you a massage later." Harry said, getting the cork out for Louis. Louis hummed in approval, snatching the wine bottle from him and attempting to pour himself some more wine, but getting a lot of it on  the counter. "Hell." Louis muttered, setting the bottle down. "I'll clean up, baby. You just drink your wine." Harry said, pressing a kiss to his head. Harry quickly wiped up the mess with a paper towel, not minding it at all. "We're going to bed after you finish this, okay?" Harry said. Louis nodded as he downed his class of wine, wiping his mouth once he finished drinking. "You're pretty." Harry said, placing his hands on Louis' hips. Louis giggled, setting his wine glass down. He reached up, playing with Harry's curls. 

"I want a baby." Louis said. "Do you?" Harry asked. Louis nodded. "Yeah. A boy." "One day, princess." Harry told him. "Maybe I can get pregnant." Louis said. "No, baby, you can't get pregnant. I'm sorry." Harry said. "But can't we try? Maybe- maybe if you cum in me enough, I can get pregnant?" Louis said. "Baby, that's not how it works, I'm sorry." Harry told him. Louis looked up at him, eyes filling with tears. "I want a baby." Louis whispered, burying his face in Harry's chest, crossing his arms while Harry held him close. "I'm sorry, baby. If we could have a baby then we would, but we can't. I'm sorry, princess." Harry told him. Louis didn't answers, sniffling into Harry's chest. "Please try." Louis whimpered after a while. "Okay, baby. We can try. But I don't want you to be disappointed when you don't get pregnant." Harry said. Louis sniffed, nodding his head.

Harry gently picked him up, carrying him to their bedroom, laying him down. He fucked him nice and slow, filling him with his seed. At the end of the night, Harry pushed a plug into him and pulled him close before they fell asleep. 

\--

"We're getting married tomorrow." Harry whispered. Louis smiled, nodding. "Don't get me wrong, I'm so excited for this wedding, for us to be married, but... But after the wedding, I'm going to ravish you." Harry whispered. "Are you? Because that's not on the schedule." Louis giggled. "Fuck your damn schedule. If mind blowing celebratory sex isn't on your schedule, then you need to set your priorities straight." Harry said. Louis smiled, moving to kiss him . "I love you, Louis." Harry whispered when Louis pulled away. "I love you, too. So much, Haz, so much." Louis said, smiling. "You look so sad about loving me. Are you okay?" Louis asked. "I'm amazing, baby boy. I'm going to go now so you can get some rest. Big big day tomorrow and I want you to feel great when you wake up." Harry said. "Okay. I'll see you tomorrow. I love you so much." Louis said, sitting up as Harry got up. "I love you more. I love you so so much." Harry said, kissing him softly. 

Louis watched as Harry left, giving him a small smile before he closed the door. Louis smiled, picking up his phone and dialing Harry's number. "Yes?" Harry's voice chuckled. "I love you. Please don't have sex the stripper at your surprise party." Louis whispered. Louis could hear the joy in Harry's laugh, he was so smitten. "Well it's not a surprise party anymore." Harry chuckled. "Just please don't have sex with the stripper. Or get a boner when he gives you a lap dance. Please." Louis said. "Okay, I won't. I promise." Harry said. "I love you so much." Louis whispered. "I love you, too." Harry said, soothingly. Louis smiled, staying quiet. "I'm gonna go now, Princess. Next time we see each other, you'll be walking down the aisle, and I'll be waiting, Lou. Our entire families will be there and all of our friends and some of our family's friends, and- and we're getting married tomorrow, Lou." Harry rambled. "I know." Louis whispered, smiling. "I love you." "I love you, too." "Bye, Princess. Be good." 

\-- One year later --

"Louis, I want to talk to you about something."  
Harry said. "What is it, honey?" Louis asked, eyes glued to his phone. "Do you think you could maybe put your phone down for a minute? It's kind of important." Harry said. Louis locked his phone, setting it down, looking up at Harry. "I want to adopt." Harry said. Louis looked at him for a moment, thinking the words through. "Now?" "Soon." "L-like an infant or a toddler?" Louis asked. "Well, actually, I thought that maybe we could try surrogacy? Unless you'd rather just adopt." Harry said, nervously biting his lip. "We're in our early twenties." Louis said. "We're married and I want a baby with you." Harry said. "I haven't even finished college yet. Don't I need a steady job before we can just have a child?" "I thought... I thought you'd want to do this with me." Harry said. 

"I do, I do, just- don't you think we could wait a few years? Like... I want to be sure that when we decide to have a baby, that we both have stable jobs, that we can provide for him or her or- we're both so young, Haz. I'm just not ready." Louis said. Harry frowned, pushing the covers off of himself, getting up. "What are you doing?" Louis asked, eyebrows furrowed. "Sleeping in the guest bedroom tonight." Harry spat. Louis rolled his eyes, picking his phone up. "You're being completely unreasonable." Louis said, dryly. "I want a baby. I've wanted a baby for a while now, I- you know what? It's fine. It's whatever. I asked, my hopes were too high. You said no. I knew it was a possibility. I'm not angry at you. I'm upset because what if you keep putting it off? What if I never get to have a baby?" Harry asked, facing Louis. "I'm just trying to do what I think would be best. I want to have children with you, but not right this minute." Louis said. Harry turned around, going to the furthest bedroom, getting in the bed as quick as he could. 

\--

"When are you going to come back to our room?" Louis asked. Harry shrugged, eyes trained on TV. "C'mon. Come spend time with me." Louis said, pouting out his bottom lip, leaning his shoulder against the door frame. "Please, daddy?" Louis whimpered. "Louis, not right now." Harry sighed. "But-" "Louis." Harry warned, shooting him a glare. Louis frowned, eyes beginning to sting with tears. "Okay." He said quietly, turning around to sulk back to his room. He looked around before climbing into bed, grabbing Harry's pillow to pull close to him, smelling his all too familiar scent. He felt stupid as he cried into the pillow, chest burning and nose itching as he hoped and prayed that Harry would come comfort him, but it never came. Harry turned off the television, checking his phone for the time. It was nearly midnight and he felt strangely comfortable as he slept in a bed alone, he didn't even think about missing Louis laying next to him. He just closed his eyes and waited for a dreamless sleep to take over. 

\--

"How was your day?" Harry asked. "Do you really care?" Louis asked. "Of course I do. You're my husband." Harry said, setting his fork down. "Okay. It was fine. I went to school. I took a test. I came home. I cooked. And now I'm ready for bed." Louis said. "Do you have class tomorrow?" Harry asked. "Well I do have class on weekdays. Last time I checked, Friday is a weekday." Louis said, voice laced with far too dramatic sarcasm. "Call in a sick day. Spend the long weekend with me." Harry said, licking his thumb and reaching to wipe a little sauce from the corner of Louis' mouth. Louis cringed away, looking at him harsh. "Finals are next week. I'm not skipping class." Louis said. Harry frowned, drawing his hand back. "Oh. But Saturday and Sunday?  
We'll spend the weekend together?" Harry asked. Louis shrugged, looking down at his phone. "We haven't had an actual conversation in nearly two months." Harry said quietly. "And this is the first time you've actually spoken to me in nearly two months. I try all of the time, Harry." Louis said. Harry turned away, shrugging. "I've been depressed." He said quietly. "Okay." Louis said. 

Harry frowned, reaching to snatch Louis' phone from him. Louis glared at him, looking up to meet his gaze. "I miss you." Harry croaked. "I'm right here." Louis said. "You're the one who sleeps in the guest bedroom and sits in there to watch television and eat and-" "Are you unhappy with me?" Harry asked. "I'm unhappy right now." Louis said. "Because of me?" "Because of our current situation." "Which is?" "We never talk or kiss or spend time with each other or sleep by each other or touch or anything, and my studies have been stressing me out." Louis said. "We can work on that. I don't want you to fall out of love with me." Harry said. "I haven't fallen out of love with you." Louis whispered. "Me either. I miss you. A lot." "I miss you, too." 

"C'mere." Harry said, scooting closer. Louis leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. "Maybe we should go to bed. We'll go out to eat tomorrow after I get home from work, we'll spend the weekend together. After finals, summer comes,  we have the whole summer." He said, giving Louis a small smile. Louis nodded, following as Harry got up. Harry slept in the bed with Louis that night, he held Louis close and ran his fingers up and down his back and whispered how much he loved him every other minute. He knew that everything was going to be alright.

\--

"You're quiet today, Princess." Harry said, stroking Louis' hair. " 'Ve run out of words. Plus that feels really good and I might fall asleep soon." Louis murmured against Harry's skin. "We haven't even gotten out of bed yet." Harry chuckled. "Don't care. M sleepy." "You look so pretty." Harry smiled. Louis smiled, pressing a kiss to his burning skin. Louis let out a whine as Harry got up, letting him fall onto the bed. "Come back, miss you." Louis whined. Harry crawled over him, leaning down to press soft kisses to his neck. "I have work, Princess." "No, no, stay, please stay, Haz." Louis whined, eyes flying open. "I know, baby, I want to stay, but I can't, I really need to go. I'll be back before you know it." Harry said. "Just call in sick, we can have fun together, please." Louis whimpered, wrapping his arms around Harry's neck. "I guess, Princess." Harry sighed in defeat. "Really? You will?" "For you, yes." Harry said, breaking from Louis' hold to grab his phone. 

He quickly called in, coming up with a quick fib so that he could stay home with Louis. "Okay, come back, c'mon." Louis whined once Harry hung up. "Look so beautiful for me, baby." Harry said, jumping into bed. "Love you, love you, love you." Harry murmured, pressing the words into his skin. He leaned down to kiss his neck, kissing down his chest, then stopping at his navel. "Most beautiful boy in the world, baby." Harry said, licking a stripe across his burning skin. "Taste so good, too." He groaned, moving to swipe his tongue across one of Louis' nipples. Louis whined, cupping Harry's cheeks and pulling him closer to his face to kiss him. "I love you so much. Forever. I promise." Harry whispered. "I love you, too, Haz." Louis said. "You know the whole children issue? You know, I'd be able to manage if you never wanted kids. I just want you to be happy. And if kids won't make you happy, then that would be okay." Harry said. "I want kids someday, Haz. I promise, we'll get your baby." Louis said, gently carding his fingers through Harry's hair. Harry gave him a small smile, plopping down beside Louis. "Pretty boy." Harry giggled, leaning to kiss him quickly.

"We're gonna be okay. Always going to be okay." Louis whispered. "Of course. It's me and you. As long as we're both here, everything is going to be just fine." Louis nodded, reaching up to gently tug on one of Harry's curls. "When we have kids, I want them to have curly hair like this. Long and pretty and soft. And green eyes. Beautiful green eyes." Louis said. "No, I want them to have your eyes. I like blue eyes." Harry said.  "Do you want a boy or girl?" Louis whispered. "A girl. Definitely a girl." Harry said, smiling wide. "I've always wanted a boy." Louis said. "But I think I wouldn't mind a girl. I would name her Emma." "Oh, would you?" Harry laughed. "Yes. I would, actually. What would you want to name her?" Louis asked. "Scott." Harry said. "Scott. For a girl?" Harry nodded. "I like it, actually." Louis said. "But we might change our minds. It's a while away." Harry said. Louis gave him a small smile. "It'll be here before you know it." Louis whispered. 

Harry smiled, leaning into kiss him slowly. "I love you more than words can say." "Sap." Louis giggled. "You love me back." "I do. So much, Haz." "Sap." Harry mocked. 

\---

God I'm so bad at endings oops


End file.
